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Thursday Morning One-Liners

Said Bills WR Terrell Owens, “When I was 10 or 11 I entered a Michael Jackson contest in my hometown and won. My mom made me the glitter socks. I had the jacket, the glove, the leather pants, the everything.” [Editor’s note: And yet another piece of the complex brain stew comes into focus.]

Miami real estate developer Jorge Perez is expected to be hired as a Vice Chairman of the Dolphins. [Editor’s note: I’m not familiar with any of his music.]

The Patriots are inviting fans to vote on the top 10 moments in franchise history.

Jets QB Mark Sanchez said he feels a kinship with fellow rookie QB Matthew Stafford.

How will the Ravens three-headed backfield share shake out in the 2009 season.

The Bengals ranked 118th on ESPN the Magazine‘s Ultimate Standings of 122 North American pro sports franchises.

Tiger Woods responded to criticism lobbed his way by former Browns RB Jim Brown.

Steelers LB James Farrior and CB Ike Taylor work out together in the offseason and neither has missed a game due to injury since 2005.

Said Texans WR Kevin Walter, “This year, I really want to work on my stiff arm and other moves that get you a few more yards after the catch. Once you get the ball in your hands, you have to do something special with it.” [Editor’s note: It would be really easy to say, “That’s what she said” at this point. So we won’t.]

Colts DE Marcus Howard anticipates having a bigger impact in his second season.

Said Jaguars C Brad Meester of his high school coach, the late Ed Thomas, “I’d love to be able to find a great picture of him and put it up in my locker, just to remind me of all those values he taught me. Just carry on all those things that meant so much to him.”

Would you rather have Titans RB Chris Johnson or Jaguars RB Maurice Jones-Drew? [Editor’s note: Until “Every Coach’s Dream” becomes Shawne Merriman’s nightmare, we’ll take Jones-Drew.]

Former Broncos WR Willie Green is using the golf course he owns in Shelby, N.C. to introduce the game to young African-Americans.

Construction is set to begin on the Chiefs new training camp facility at Missouri Western State University.

Said Raiders LB Ricky Brown, “It’s something that is hard to describe, but when you play here you completely understand it. There is no one else like the Raiders and the fans are the same way.”

Citing safety concerns after a pipe burst in February, the Chargers will close training camp to the public.

Dan Steinberg of the Washington Post has a report from Congressional Golf Course where Cowboys QB Tony Romo played with Tiger Woods.

Giants LB Danny Clark’s football camp also included discussions of sexually transmitted diseases.

E! Online has video of Eagles WR Hank Baskett’s wedding to former Playboy Playmate Kendra Wilkinson. [Editor’s note: It might be the first time that anyone has ever intentionally filmed video of Hank Baskett.]

Redskins WR Jaison Williams is hoping his size gives him an advantage in the battle for a roster spot.

Brad Biggs of the Chicago Sun-Times looks at how the Bears might choose to spend their salary cap room.

The Lions have created an all-you-can-eat section of seats at Ford Field. [Editor’s note: And it they eat so much that they feel the need to vomit, they only need to watch some of the game.]

Packers rookie OL T.J. Lang is eager to start practicing in pads.

Dave Myers of the LaCrosse Tribune writes that “if seeing [QB Brett] Favre play for Minnesota [Vikings] destroys our memories of his career, it says more about us than it does about him.”

Cowboys LB Keith Brooking still laments biting on a play-action fake during his last game with the Falcons.

The Panthers released Mike Juergens and Brit Miller, a pair of rookie linebackers.

FoxSports.com ranks the Saints as having the 11th best running back package in the NFL.

Said Buccaneers CB Ronde Barber, “When you’ve been with a team as long as I have and been able to play under Monte [Kiffin] for so long, there’s a comfort level, but this is a new challenge and I’m excited about it.”

Cardinals rookie S Rashad Johnson says it would be a dream to have a career like his teammate Adrian Wilson’s.

Bill Coats of the St. Louis Post Dispatch writes that Rams DT Adam Carriker looked stronger and faster during offseason workouts. [Editor’s note: Maybe everyone else is just getting weaker and slower.]

TE Vernon Davis’ college coaches think the 49ers will get more out of him if they use him on simpler passing plays.

Staying healthy is the top priority for the Seahawks receiving corps.