Skip to content

Tony Romo has a built-in excuse, too

We’ve previously pointed out that, in this era of injury secrecy and skullduggery (it’s probably redundant, but the term “skullduggery” simply isn’t used as much as it should be), Brett Favre’s willingness to tattoo a target on his partially torn rotator cuff likely arises from a desire to have an advance excuse for not playing well in 2009.

Tony Romo now has a similar excuse.

Specifically, Romo has been cursed.

Per the Pulitzer-winning National Enquirer, former Romo girlfriend Jessica Simpson found a witch on the Internet (where else?) to put a hex on the Cowboys starting quarterback.  Says the report, “The two met at the star’s Beverly Hills home where they lit a candle, burned some incense and performed a couple of incantations.”

The curse primarily focuses on impeding Romo’s ability to fall in love again, but football failure also was included.  (She apparently had a coupon, or something.)

She possibly would have cursed Romo to forever look like Gomer Pyle, but someone already has beaten her to that one.  

Permalink 70 Comments Feed for comments Latest Stories in: Dallas Cowboys, Rumor Mill, Top Stories
70 Responses to “Tony Romo has a built-in excuse, too”
  1. SaintsBucsPanthersSUKK says: Aug 25, 2009 9:59 AM

    Internet witch = con artist

  2. Florio-is-a-tool says: Aug 25, 2009 10:00 AM

    So now he’s going to play well in big games? Or is he going to do the Groundhog Day thing and relive December 28, 2008 every day for the next ten years?

  3. hayward giablommi says: Aug 25, 2009 10:01 AM

    Hey Mike, when you get around to reinstituting the comment ratings, how about letting the readers rate your articles?
    Since comment ratings keep the commentators in check, I think the readers need to keep you in check. Man oh man. This season cannot start soon enough.

  4. Big Stretch says: Aug 25, 2009 10:01 AM

    What the hell is this???

  5. Fike Mlorio says: Aug 25, 2009 10:02 AM

    the cowboys just make it too easy

  6. Kevin from Philly says: Aug 25, 2009 10:02 AM

    “The curse primarily focuses on impeding Romo’s ability to fall in love again”.
    Just with women? He’s probably OK with that curse.

  7. Dustin Chandler says: Aug 25, 2009 10:04 AM

    LOL
    THE CURSE OF THE BLONDE BAM-BIMBO

  8. Rossum20 says: Aug 25, 2009 10:04 AM

    Is it football season yet?

  9. dawk20db says: Aug 25, 2009 10:04 AM

    It’s about flippin’ time you do some real reporting. I was tired of you always relying on shady “league sources.” Well done sir.

  10. JimmySmith says: Aug 25, 2009 10:05 AM

    Given the Cowboys haven’t won a playoff game in over a decade, just how is the “witch” going to prove her hex is actually working?
    Seems to me if Romo is fumbling snaps and throwing INT’s in playoff losses, the hex already started.

  11. FireJerryJones says: Aug 25, 2009 10:06 AM

    Or maybe she just gave him the dose…

  12. Youngone says: Aug 25, 2009 10:11 AM

    Wow. Yours sources are garbage. I had to re-register to tell you your integrity is gone with this story

  13. stiller43 says: Aug 25, 2009 10:15 AM

    That explains it. One of his high school ex-girlfriends must have put the November-January football curse on him already.

  14. Diggs says: Aug 25, 2009 10:16 AM

    seriously, i love coming to this site but i couldn’t even finish reading this “article.” are you trying to get a job with Wow! magazine?

  15. vbeach31 says: Aug 25, 2009 10:18 AM

    No more excuses. We gave up our best offensive weapon to become more “Romo friendly”, which is the gayest quote ever.He better deliver a playoff win this year.

  16. LL Live says: Aug 25, 2009 10:18 AM

    “She possibly would have cursed Romo to forever look like Gomer Pyle, but someone already has beaten her to that one. ”
    This coming from a guy who looks like a homsexual waiter from an episode of the Soprano’s

  17. whywerule says: Aug 25, 2009 10:20 AM

    The curse primarily focuses on impeding Romo’s ability to fall in love again, but football failure also was included….
    Unfortunately for ‘boys fans, Romo seems to have figured out football (or at least playoff) failure without a curse.

  18. EdgarSnyder says: Aug 25, 2009 10:21 AM

    If this curse was put on him 2 years ago it makes sense.
    the kid is absolute crap in the clutch and everyone outside dallas loves watching the cowgirls suck ass with their choking QB!

  19. VoxVeritas says: Aug 25, 2009 10:22 AM

    The National Enquirer? You read that? You need to get your hormone levels checked. Who cursed you to look like an even more effete version of Eddie Munster?

  20. Okey says: Aug 25, 2009 10:25 AM

    If Romo gets worse he is surely Done!

  21. Mattchew182 says: Aug 25, 2009 10:32 AM

    Sweet now when Romo chokes in the playoffs it won’t be his next girlfriend’s fault it will be his ex’s fault. Must be nice to play the blame game for your failures. Maybe if he didn’t go so Hollywood and concentrated on football he’d win a playoff game. Or maybe show up to practice and OTA’s instead of playing in a celebrity golf tournament. Of course this year he just has to try and make it back to the playoffs without T.O. Maybe its a curse from the people at IHOP for leaving Jessica crying in the parking lot. Parcells built that team and it is falling apart without him.

  22. VoxVeritas says: Aug 25, 2009 10:32 AM

    A real curse would be giving him Aaron Rodgers’ “skills”.

  23. Wrathchild says: Aug 25, 2009 10:33 AM

    Are you kidding?

  24. rawisdan says: Aug 25, 2009 10:33 AM

    LOL @ Dustin Chandler
    “THE CURSE OF THE BLONDE BAM-BIMBO”

  25. BradyGazelle says: Aug 25, 2009 10:35 AM

    Muffing snaps and snapping muffs.

  26. mustbechris says: Aug 25, 2009 10:35 AM

    this is really an article? come on.

  27. newty25 says: Aug 25, 2009 10:42 AM

    I was with Tony when a witch put an anti-curse spell on him to prevent curses from working.
    This is actually something that most teams do for their QBs as witchcraft and underground sorcery is a huge part of the NFL underground.
    Jessica is late to the party, again.

  28. IndianaJohnson says: Aug 25, 2009 10:45 AM

    This is the best thing I’ve read on PFT so far. My wife thinks Tony Romo looks just like Gomer Pyle. And I think he plays like Gomer Pyle. Maybe the Cowboys need Sgt Carter for their head coach.

  29. Vick's failed drug test says: Aug 25, 2009 10:47 AM

    If you are looking for Gomer Pyle, then you need to look in San Diego, because that’s where he’s currently residing under center.

  30. rjs says: Aug 25, 2009 10:48 AM

    Wow, and I thought this guy was the worst sports writer on the planet before I read that crap.

  31. Porscheblack says: Aug 25, 2009 10:53 AM

    I think Colt Brennan needs to be thanking his life coach Chris Cooley right now, or he might’ve been the next victim… and he certainly doesn’t need any bad luck to have a rough game.

  32. Hedley Lamarr says: Aug 25, 2009 10:57 AM

    Florio, you should be forced to turn in your ‘man card’ for having even visited that celeb gossip website.
    Unfotunately, since you sucked me into that link, mine has just been put in the mail.

  33. Samuel L. Bronkowitz says: Aug 25, 2009 11:04 AM

    He banged Jessica Simpson and has a big-money contract… how cursed can he be?

  34. FumbleNuts says: Aug 25, 2009 11:07 AM

    The QB for the NY Giants looks like Gomer Pyle and the head coach resembles Sgt. Carter.

  35. lrh289 says: Aug 25, 2009 11:15 AM

    wow hard hitting media…… very relevant b.s.

  36. jimicos says: Aug 25, 2009 11:25 AM

    He wasn’t already cursed? Let’s see.. Plays for the Cowboys. Can’t win a big game to save his life. Spent 3 years playing with T.O.. Sounds like a curse to me.

  37. VoxVeritas says: Aug 25, 2009 11:33 AM

    “Sweet now when Romo chokes in the playoffs it won’t be his next girlfriend’s fault it will be his ex’s fault. Must be nice to play the blame game for your failures. Maybe if he didn’t go so Hollywood and concentrated on football he’d win a playoff game. Or maybe show up to practice and OTA’s instead of playing in a celebrity golf tournament.”
    Wow, how uninformed can one person be? You may have set a record.

  38. Stradivarius says: Aug 25, 2009 11:37 AM

    If I were Tony, I would leak that my own internet witch cast Aura of No Fat Chicks on me, not only preventing a repeat of the mistakes of the past, but assuring that the door was closed on their ‘relationship’ forever.

  39. danlinker says: Aug 25, 2009 11:38 AM

    This what you get when you date a BIMBO.

  40. DoomsDayD75 says: Aug 25, 2009 11:43 AM

    SHE’S A WITCH! BURN HER!

  41. wydok says: Aug 25, 2009 11:45 AM

    God bless Jessica Simpson.

  42. Jackal138 says: Aug 25, 2009 11:52 AM

    If Romo was that bad at football WITHOUT a curse, I’d hate to see how bad he is with it.
    Or maybe it’s like combining a negative with a negative, this curse will cancel out whatever bad juju caused 44-6, thus allowing him to finally win a playoff game?
    I can’t wait until the end of next season, when Cowboys fans can go back to the ultimately logical argument of blaming a dude’s girlfriend for how he performs (or fails to perform) on field.

  43. Joe in Toronto, Canada says: Aug 25, 2009 12:00 PM

    He doesn’t only look like Gomer Pyle, he’s like him in other ways too.
    Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  44. myasylum says: Aug 25, 2009 12:01 PM

    I really hope thats not true. Not that I’m a fan of hers, but to think anyone would do such a thing saddens me.

  45. VoxVeritas says: Aug 25, 2009 12:09 PM

    Millions of bucks, banged Jessica Simpson, Sophia Bush, Michelle Johnson, Carrie Underwood, Britney Spears now he’s allegedly humping a hot 22 year old E. Illinois coed and on top of that he got a $100,000 boat for his birthday and I’m supposed to believe that he’s cursed? Seriously?

  46. VonClausewitz says: Aug 25, 2009 12:19 PM

    LOL this sounds about right for Jessica Simpson.

  47. redsquare says: Aug 25, 2009 12:22 PM

    I really wish all of the “Florio, you suck” commenters would cut it out. You’re wasting everyone’s time filling these boards with useless junk.
    Think what Florio writes isn’t worth much? Then don’t read it. How much less do you think your stupid comments are worth to everyone else? You’re just cluttering the page and wasting my time as I scan through comment after smartass comment from people who apparently think their contribution is somehow valuable to the rest of us.
    It’s not.
    Comment about the content of the story–discuss the issues. If you don’t like Florio, then write him an e-mail and insult him man to man. But you likely don’t have the guts to do that, so at least have the courtesy to spare us all from your insecure, gutless whining here.

  48. Fan_Of_ Four says: Aug 25, 2009 12:40 PM

    I have never been more attracted to Jessica as I am right now .

  49. footballrulz says: Aug 25, 2009 12:57 PM

    Thank u redsquare

  50. footballrulz says: Aug 25, 2009 1:01 PM

    Only complaint I have about this site is the time it takes for reply to actually hit. I’m a pretty fast speed reader–how ’bout Florio and the rest of ‘em just open up new posts & pay me to look for the 7 Carlin words. You guys don;t need to waste your time doing that crap & I could work from home. How about it Flo? I’m reasonable when it comes to salary…Hell, it’s NBC’s money now anyway

  51. INVAIDUH says: Aug 25, 2009 1:03 PM

    Stop kissin’ a$$ redsquare.
    Now you’re leaving “stupid comments”.
    You’re not going to get a job.
    Step off your soap box.

  52. Jackal138 says: Aug 25, 2009 1:04 PM

    # VoxVeritas says: August 25, 2009 12:09 PM
    Millions of bucks, banged Jessica Simpson, Sophia Bush, Michelle Johnson, Carrie Underwood, Britney Spears now he’s allegedly humping a hot 22 year old E. Illinois coed and on top of that he got a $100,000 boat for his birthday and I’m supposed to believe that he’s cursed? Seriously?
    —————–
    He also has a fat internet troll with a neckbeard to gleefully slobber on his knob every time PFT has a post about him, Jerry Jones, or the NFC East.
    How lucky can one guy be!?

  53. andres says: Aug 25, 2009 1:10 PM

    redsquare and Florio sittin’ on a tree

  54. Hugh says: Aug 25, 2009 1:27 PM

    lol @ Vox defending Romo and Jerry.
    What a homer and idiot.

  55. EskinSux says: Aug 25, 2009 1:29 PM

    So………Florio is at the supermarket, waiting in the checkout line, scanning the tabloids, when he sees the words Jessica Simpson/Tony Romo on the cover of the National Enquirer. Hurriedly he puts his dented cans, half pound of bologna and Kraft mac n cheese on the belt. He flips thu the pages. wow he thinks…….What a great story. Alot better than the MJ is still alive and living in Graceland headliner…..I think this is news worthy enough to inform the football fans that visit my site…..Is this for real?…..

  56. EskinSux says: Aug 25, 2009 1:41 PM

    Jackal138 says:
    August 25, 2009 1:04 PM
    He also has a fat internet troll with a neckbeard to gleefully slobber on his knob every time PFT has a post about him, Jerry Jones, or the NFC East.
    How lucky can one guy be!?
    ——————————————–
    Too funny……..I wonder if this Bromance info was taken from the National Enquirer. Sure as hell seems like it………

  57. texasPHINSfan says: Aug 25, 2009 1:50 PM

    jesus.
    how old is jessica anyway? 5? she’s an idiot. this should make her radioactive to any other males she meets.

  58. bonecity7 says: Aug 25, 2009 1:58 PM

    redsquare,
    AMEN!! Thank you for posting that……way too many trolls in here!!!
    Vox,
    I don’t know if I’ve ever agreed with you before, but…I’m with you 100% on your 12:09 PM post!!!

  59. Kevin from Philly says: Aug 25, 2009 2:14 PM

    Ah, who are we kidding? Vox has been playing Dungeons and Dragons for years – if magic really worked, the Cowboys would have twenty Superbowls and he’d be dating Romo.

  60. spyboots says: Aug 25, 2009 2:19 PM

    Well, Romo could hire his own witch to reverse this spell. (He might have to drink something yucky or wear something that smells horrible, but I’m sure if he looks on the Internet, he dould find someone to remove the curse.)
    PS – @ Vox – 5 for your comment

  61. m2002m says: Aug 25, 2009 2:22 PM

    He already had a built-in excuse: He sucks.

  62. BorisBulldog says: Aug 25, 2009 2:22 PM

    I doubt if anyone needs to put a curse on Romo!
    If you’ve watched Romo play, you can see he can crap his own pants in big games without any help from a witch!

  63. mnmaverick says: Aug 25, 2009 2:25 PM

    The curse primarily focuses on impeding Romo’s ability to fall in love again, but football failure also was included. (She apparently had a coupon, or something.)
    She possibly would have cursed Romo to forever look like Gomer Pyle, but someone already has beaten her to that one.
    —————————————————————————————–
    If Tony speaks like a moron like Gomer Pyle, that will take care of the inability to land a woman part.

  64. emoser says: Aug 25, 2009 2:54 PM

    “# Jackal138 says: August 25, 2009 1:04 PM
    # VoxVeritas says: August 25, 2009 12:09 PM
    Millions of bucks, banged Jessica Simpson, Sophia Bush, Michelle Johnson, Carrie Underwood, Britney Spears now he’s allegedly humping a hot 22 year old E. Illinois coed and on top of that he got a $100,000 boat for his birthday and I’m supposed to believe that he’s cursed? Seriously?
    —————–
    He also has a fat internet troll with a neckbeard to gleefully slobber on his knob every time PFT has a post about him, Jerry Jones, or the NFC East.
    How lucky can one guy be!?”
    ————————
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  65. spyboots says: Aug 25, 2009 3:09 PM

    I think KevinfromPhilly deserves a free copy of your book for his comment.

  66. Dewey Axewound says: Aug 25, 2009 3:34 PM

    Jackal138 says:
    August 25, 2009 1:04 PM
    # VoxVeritas says: August 25, 2009 12:09 PM
    Millions of bucks, banged Jessica Simpson, Sophia Bush, Michelle Johnson, Carrie Underwood, Britney Spears now he’s allegedly humping a hot 22 year old E. Illinois coed and on top of that he got a $100,000 boat for his birthday and I’m supposed to believe that he’s cursed? Seriously?
    —————–
    He also has a fat internet troll with a neckbeard to gleefully slobber on his knob every time PFT has a post about him, Jerry Jones, or the NFC East.
    How lucky can one guy be!?
    _______________________________
    I know!
    Bash his teeth in with the butt end of your rifle!!
    THAT’LL fix ‘em, won’t it?

  67. Dewey Axewound says: Aug 25, 2009 3:43 PM

    Witchcraft, huh?
    I guess that finally explains it.
    I mean, there’s just no other explanation for her fame, is there?
    And let’s not even talk about her sister and her Michael Jackson nose.
    (Well, Jessica is somewhat hot, if you’re into banging retards. Specifically, retards that have that whole bird-beak nose, spacey, buggy bird-eyed look, with a toothy over-bite, big ears, and that fat chick grandma-pants sort of look, then sure–she’s hot as hell. For ornithophiles.)

  68. texasPHINSfan says: Aug 25, 2009 5:49 PM

    jackal138 should get a copy of the book. ;)

  69. empty13 says: Aug 25, 2009 7:29 PM

    hey, i use the term skullduggery periodically.
    your allegations regarding its lack of use are repugnant, florio! and hideous too.
    /////////////////////
    rodgers actually played hurt in 2008. butterfingers had a hurt pinkie.
    /////////////////////////////
    the cowboys need to hire coach pantsdropper fom the bay area. paradoxically, he could straighten them out.
    /////////////////////
    6-44*
    a collapse followed by a collapse. and preceded by a collapse vs. balto. bad news comes in threes! that means this must be the cowboys’ year…

  70. 10mm says: Sep 5, 2009 12:12 PM

    When Tony Romo hears this crap he cries all the way to the bank with a hot chick on his arm.
    MONEY FOR NOTHING, CHICKS FOR FREE.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Not a member? Register now!