ESPN’s Lou Holtz, in his most recent “Dr. Lou” segment, is asked a question.
By unsigned 49ers receiver Michael Crabtree.
Seriously.
Says Crabtree, “Dr. Lou, what advice do you give players when dealing with an agent?”
Says Lou, “Oh, Michael, am I glad you asked. You’re the best receiver in the country last year and you’re drafted in the first round by San Francisco. And you’re the only player that hasn’t signed a contract. Obviously, your agent is worried about dollars. Michael, you worry about sense. As in common sense.
“That agent works for you, you do not work for him. He’s gonna make millions of dollars when you sign your contract.”
So what does Dr. Lou advise, as a general rule?
He thinks a player shouldn’t hire an agent, and that the player initially should get the best offer they can from the team that drafts him. Then, the player should tell an agent that the player will give the agent half of anything more that the agent can get.
You know, we always assumed that Lou Holtz overcame his thufferin’ thuccotash thpeaking thtyle by conveying through the thpittle true pearlth of withdom.
But this is the one of the dumbest freaking things we’ve ever heard.
Apart from the obvious violations that the agent would be committing as to the rules limiting the fee to a maximum of three percent of the total value of the deal, Dr. Lou’s suggestion reflects a high degree of naivete regarding the business realities of the modern NFL.
We’ve got our own advice for Crabtree, and we’ll post it on Saturday.
Hey, we’ve got to do something to try to get you to pay us a visit when you’re on your own time.
