The title says it all.
Yes, Tom Brady is going to hell.
Ian Rapoport of the Boston Herald pointed out to us this rather critical nugget (for Brady at least) earlier in the week. It seems that the Amazing Grace Baptist Church in Canton, North Carolina has usurped the duties of St. Peter and declared Brady’s eternal damnation.
“Tom Brady has an unwed child, but it’s okay because he wins Super Bowls,” the church said on its web site. “Tom Brady is teaching us to have sex outside of marriage, to commit fornication, don’t marry and do the right thing, don’t take responsibility for your actions, have a good time no matter who you hurt in this world, go from sex partner to sex partner, and it’s okay because of who I am. How many of you dad’s [sic] cheer on Tom in the Super Bowl while your kids are watching?”
(Technically, most people with kids under the age of 18 have an “unwed child.” But we think we get the point.)
So there you have it. Like David Puddy and Elaine Benes, Brady is going to hell.
And if that’s the standard for an eternity of devils and caves and ragged clothing, Tom will have plenty of company.