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Another new name could be coming for Ochocinco

On one hand, we usually think that Bengals receiver Chad Ochocinco is engaging and funny and good for the game of football.

On the other hand, we sometimes think that he’s selfish and narcissistic and generally bad for the game of football.

Today is one of those sometimes, given the he is talking about changing his name again.  His new proposed moniker is “Hachi Go,” Japanese for “Eight Five.”  (Thanks to MJD of the Shutdown Corner for the head’s up.)

Even if it’s just idle chatter, it’s at times like this that the line between the responsible grown man and the six-year-old boy whose parents are paying enough attention to him is considerably blurred. 

And, as a practical matter, the chances of Ochocinco pulling off another name change are remote.  The first time around, he was able to slip the adjustment to his surname through the five hole of a judicial robe by blending “Ocho” and “Cinco” into one word, thus concealing to a large extent the sideshow nature of what otherwise is a fairly sober and serene human event.

So if/when Chad tries to change his name to “Hachigo,” chances are that the judicial officer might not be as inclined to rubber-stamp the move.

But we figure that won’t stop Chad from trying.

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57 Responses to “Another new name could be coming for Ochocinco”
  1. phailing101 says: Dec 10, 2009 4:31 PM

    Why on the planet would they oppose the name change?
    They’re bureaucrats. It’ll be rubber-stamped if its not explicitly insulting to anyone. Which it is not.

  2. Kaz says: Dec 10, 2009 4:32 PM

    Nice way to ignor ethe fact that the Japanese media was in town to do an interview and presented him with a jersey with it on it last sunday. It wasn’t something he just up and thought of. it was actually there idea….

  3. scomibord says: Dec 10, 2009 4:33 PM

    This was on Yahoo this morning.

  4. Bob Nelson says: Dec 10, 2009 4:34 PM

    This week there will be multiple TD celebrations as he rips through one of the worst pass defenses in the NFL.
    He is going to have the most fun he has had all year. I can’t wait for his Benny Sapp(Hill) jokes.

  5. turdfergusonpackerpoo says: Dec 10, 2009 4:35 PM

    haha, i love this guy

  6. Ross'sSweetMinus says: Dec 10, 2009 4:35 PM

    This guys a retard!

  7. downwithdansnyder says: Dec 10, 2009 4:35 PM

    Once this guy is done playing and the spot light is off him…he’s going to have one giant meltdown. One really has to question is mental stability.

  8. Manbearpig says: Dec 10, 2009 4:36 PM

    I can’t wait until the Vikings kick the shit out of the Bengals this weekend so Chad can Hachi go back Cincinnati with his poncho between his legs.

  9. bunker says: Dec 10, 2009 4:36 PM

    Judge would let him change his last name to “Dumbass” though…

  10. stevob says: Dec 10, 2009 4:38 PM

    What a douchebag.

  11. jwinn006 says: Dec 10, 2009 4:38 PM

    The only way I could hate this guy is if I my favorite team had to play against him twice a year. Well, the Cowboys don’t have to so I love this guy. He’s just having fun, no reason to take him serious. I wish we could all have as much fun at work as this guy does.

  12. Kevin from Philly says: Dec 10, 2009 4:39 PM

    Eighty five in Japanese would be hatchi jue go (literally, eight tens five), and would be pronounced hatchju-go. Of course, in Japan it would be hatchju-go san (Mr. Eightyfive) or hatchju-go jin (Eightyfive man).

  13. Ralph says: Dec 10, 2009 4:40 PM

    What valid reason would a judge have for denying the name change? As long as he’s not making the name change for fraudulent reasons, I see no reason why it should be disallowed. Their public persona is the asset they peddle in the market place. Any business has the right to change their name as long as they’re not infringing on another business.
    If he wants to change his name every year, he should be allowed to. His fans will get tired of coughing up money for new jerseys sooner rather than later. How many years can he have left as a high profile WR in the NFL? Eventually he’ll be out of the league and it won’t matter what he calls himself, no one will care. Not that they really do now anyway.

  14. blueridge624 says: Dec 10, 2009 4:40 PM

    Why is this Florio character so obsessed with Chad Hachi Go? Ridiculous.

  15. moosev says: Dec 10, 2009 4:40 PM

    You’re playing right into the hands of a bona fide DIVA. When my dog stars at me, if I look back at her she’ll wag her tail and want to play. If I don’t look at her she ducks tail and walks away. You see where I’m going with this.

  16. sven_ftw says: Dec 10, 2009 4:42 PM

    AE85 = mad dorifto!!

  17. Deb says: Dec 10, 2009 4:43 PM

    Maybe if reporters and bloggers stopped giving the six-year-old’s antics so much coverage …

  18. Facts Domino says: Dec 10, 2009 4:43 PM

    This is what Chad Johnson translates into any language.
    D. U. M. B. A. S. S.

  19. Fan_Of_ Four says: Dec 10, 2009 4:43 PM

    How do you say “Douche Bag” in Japanese ?

  20. Mark0226 says: Dec 10, 2009 4:44 PM

    Why would the county clerk (judicial officer) care if he changing his name? As long as he meets the legal requirements (see link), then they should rubber stamp it. He’s not doing it to defraud anyone, so I don’t believe there would be a problem, as long as he pays the fee.
    http://www.namechangelaw.com/states/fla/florida.htm

  21. Twiz says: Dec 10, 2009 4:45 PM

    According to what I have found, as long as you are not changing your name to hide from a crime, due to bad credit, things like that, you can change your name as often as you would like. You cannot change to an actual number, like 85, or III (as in 3), nor anything racial or obscene or anything that would be considered a “fighting” word.
    If I am right (via google search), it could greatly explain why Lord Florio no longer practices law……he seems to suck at it!
    http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/faqEditorial-29091.html

  22. RK says: Dec 10, 2009 4:49 PM

    This isn’t news or a rumor. It was in Hot Clicks on SI.com earlier in the week. Probably a sign that PFT should be paying more attention to football and less to the random crap that gets thrown up here.

  23. Poo Flinging Monkey says: Dec 10, 2009 4:50 PM

    Awesome. I wonder if he’ll go with the French “hiut cinq” in 2011?

  24. Montsta says: Dec 10, 2009 4:51 PM

    I think he should hyphenate his name to Chad Ochocinco-Hachigo. Then his kid can marry Maurice Jones-Drew’s kids one day to make little baby Ochocinco-Hachigo-Jones-Drew. Then we add the offspring of Mike Simms-Walker and…
    Oh to hell with it…

  25. sniperhare says: Dec 10, 2009 4:51 PM

    The Bengals should change his number just to see what he would do.

  26. Marty says: Dec 10, 2009 4:52 PM

    I dont know, this is a tough one – As human beings maybe we should all be able to change our names when ever we want in the name of freedom.
    Especially since we will all be micro chipped soon, what the big deal.

  27. Akshun says: Dec 10, 2009 4:52 PM

    Why is this a bad thing?? The guy is trying to sell more jerseys and is just having fun with it.. you guys in the media take it to another level and get too anal about things…
    “bad for the game of football” … seriously??
    has he been caught killing dogs, taking steroids, stepping on players faces with his cleats, throwing punches, going to jail, “making it rain” at strip clubs, getting caught with possession of coke or marijuana, having a DUI, bringin a loaded gun into a club without having it registered for that state?

  28. brian_21 says: Dec 10, 2009 4:52 PM

    This is a pointless post. This is a stupid post. It’s a frivolous opinion.
    Plus, the term “narcissist” is given out by psychologists and is not a light matter to take. Most people have narcissistic aspects about them — but aren’t really able to be called narcissistic. You must stop just saying TO, Ocho, whomever else, etc., are narcissists every time they bring attention to themselves on television. It’s irresponsible and in most cases probably technically inaccurate.

  29. Big Stuff says: Dec 10, 2009 4:52 PM

    Perhaps he can change his name to Roger Goodell. Or Enefel Suxs.

  30. Big Ten Inch says: Dec 10, 2009 4:53 PM

    I have a suggestion for his next name: Jack Ass.

  31. goetta-head says: Dec 10, 2009 4:53 PM

    He is building his worldwide audience. … It may be a little smart dare I say. Mexicans Im sure see Chad 85 as one of the most recognizable football players even and perhaps more importantly- if they are not fans of the nfl already. He is moving on to Japan. And in addition to that, dare I say Florio that he actually might have a case because his name changing is to expand his market share and his business opportunities. I didnt know they were laws that forbade the pursuit of happiness?

  32. Ridnaway says: Dec 10, 2009 4:55 PM

    If this keeps up pretty soon an old 85 Chad Johnson jersey will be worth as much as a Mickey Mantle rookie card.

  33. Love_Boat_Scandal says: Dec 10, 2009 4:59 PM

    Can’t wait for Ochocinco to score a TD Sunday and steal Fagnar’s motorcycle. That will be awesome.

  34. VoxVeritas says: Dec 10, 2009 5:06 PM

    “The first time around, he was able to slip the adjustment to his surname through the five hole of a judicial robe by blending “Ocho” and “Cinco” into one word”
    He didn’t jump through a legal loophole by combining the words “ocho” and “cinco” to make one last name, because there’s no need. If he wanted his first name to be “Chad” and his last name to be “Arroz con Pollo y Salsa Verde” he could have it that way. It’s not uncommon to have two words that make up one last name, like Jack “Del Rio”, or Antwaan “Randle El”. He just chose to combine the words.
    “So if/when Chad tries to change his name to “Hachigo,” chances are that the judicial officer might not be as inclined to rubber-stamp the move.”
    100% guaranteed they’ll rubber stamp it, barring a finding that he wants to change his name for fraudulent or immoral purposes.

  35. sand0 says: Dec 10, 2009 5:11 PM

    He is the Flavor Flave of football. Just an obnoxious idiot that children find entertaining. I think the adults should just top paying attention to his antics. What message are we sending to our kids? If they want attention just do something many people find annoying. Great message.

  36. RavensFreak00 says: Dec 10, 2009 5:15 PM

    How about Johnson?

  37. Deb says: Dec 10, 2009 5:18 PM

    @sniperhare …
    Okay, that made me laugh out loud :-)

  38. WhoPlaysWhere says: Dec 10, 2009 5:21 PM

    @Kevin from Philly, you’re dumb and we already had this discussion with OchoCinco.
    @Montsta, you my friend are hilarious. That is comical!!!!

  39. PurpleNGold says: Dec 10, 2009 5:27 PM

    Likely thought up by the N. F. L. for the purpose of expansion. Hope he makes a ton of money from the publicity.

  40. Spokentruth says: Dec 10, 2009 5:28 PM

    They need to start selling jerseys with Velcro names and numbers, that way when players change names/teams nobody has to go buy new jerseys. Then who would really care about this crap except the players that the league would have found a way to screw out of their 6% cut for sales.

  41. Bigskyvikes says: Dec 10, 2009 5:43 PM

    Bob Nelson are you talking about when they played the packers?
    Yeah I know your right, that was great!
    Good times!
    Good times!

  42. Sasquash says: Dec 10, 2009 5:45 PM

    This guy is a wake job, but I love him.All of you uptight wormburners need to stop being babies and have some fun with his madness. Some of you need to just lighten up.CHILD PLEASE!

  43. lskynard87 says: Dec 10, 2009 5:51 PM

    I think he is kind of a parody of the NFL… sort of like The Comedian’s character in Watchmen.
    He’s playing a sport for the sake of entertainment, and he’s quite the entertainer; yet it’s the very form of entertainment he is tainting.
    It’s almost a necessary evil to keep the NFL going strong.

  44. JAG880 says: Dec 10, 2009 6:01 PM

    This guy has more aliases than Sydney Bristow. Yeah, I know. I have a problem staying current with my references.

  45. jibfest says: Dec 10, 2009 6:16 PM

    Change your name to “I care more about my sidelines antics and being a jackass than I care about winning the Superbowl”.

  46. Chevy says: Dec 10, 2009 6:23 PM

    Blueridge, Scumio isn’t obsessed with Ocho Sucko as much as he’s in love with him. His dream is a Ward/Florio/Ocho threesome.

  47. buzzbissinger says: Dec 10, 2009 6:36 PM

    Two thoughts:
    1. If you guys stopped reporting every time he breaks wind, this childish behavior would cease. So it’s on YOU media.
    2. I going to stop reading the comments on this site; you guys are a bunch of knee-jerk blow-hards.

  48. Jungle Juice says: Dec 10, 2009 6:43 PM

    @Kevin From Philly. Since your being so technical it would be: 八十五

  49. BonnieD says: Dec 10, 2009 6:51 PM

    Florio, your problem is you take Chad seriously. Lighten up.

  50. Setobakura says: Dec 10, 2009 6:56 PM

    “I think he should hyphenate his name to Chad Ochocinco-Hachigo. Then his kid can marry Maurice Jones-Drew’s kids one day to make little baby Ochocinco-Hachigo-Jones-Drew. Then we add the offspring of Mike Simms-Walker and…
    Oh to hell with it…”
    Or he could marry one of Chris Fuamatu Ma’afala’s children

  51. Hail2ThaRedskins says: Dec 10, 2009 7:11 PM

    Florio,
    People are allowed to change their names in this country for any personal reason as long as it is not linked to a fraudulent purpose. Marketing is not considered fraudulent, in fact this is a very common practice amongst actors.
    Furthermore, lets be honest he didnt slip the first name change pass anybody. There is no sitting judge in america that did not know why he wanted to change his name. It is legal in this country to change your name as many time as you want (as long as you aren’t trying to evade authorities or commit some other crime by doing so).
    Now if he wanted to change his Social Security number he would need legal justification, not required to change your name!

  52. lamename says: Dec 10, 2009 7:37 PM

    “Hachi Go,” Japanese for “Eight Five.”
    As any InitialD fan knows, a haichi-go is a LESSER cousin to the haichi-roku (86) that the hero improbably drives to downhill racing greatness (every .. single … episode).
    OK, I’ll take my nerdiness elsewhere…. Besides, he’s gonna do whatever he wants to do, anyway :)

  53. Favre On HGH says: Dec 10, 2009 10:05 PM

    “Hachi Go,” Japanese for “Eight Five.”
    Imagine there is an endorsement link to something somewhere in this.

  54. PervyHarvin says: Dec 10, 2009 10:45 PM

    Ocho’s new name: Jap Slapped in Minnesota

  55. mnmaverick says: Dec 11, 2009 9:08 AM

    He should change his name to “Chinese, Japanese, Dirty Knees, Look at These”
    It would suite his maturity level and enrage the politically correct crowd world-wide. What more could he ask for? :::smirk:::

  56. josdin00 says: Dec 11, 2009 11:48 AM

    This will never happen … we all know he’ll be changing his name back to “Johnson” after this weekend:
    http://pacifistviking.blogspot.com/2009/10/ochocinco-vs-mn-secondary.html

  57. coachglove says: Dec 11, 2009 3:59 PM

    @VoxVeritas & @Hail…he did have to slip it through a loophole because you are not allowed to change your name to a number, which both ocho and cinco are. In Spanish, ochocinco is not a number, hence him being allowed to make the change. if he had done “Chad Ocho-Cinco” it could’ve been disallowed. Since ochocinco isn’t even a word, much less a number he was good to go.
    You don’t have the unlimited right to change your name, but in the case of the proposed name in the article, it would be hard for a judge to have grounds to deny the change.

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