Meet Jim Bob Cooter

In our most recent post, we mentioned that Jim Bob Cooter has been promoted from staff assistant to offensive assistant.  It was the first time we’d ever heard the name “Jim Bob Cooter,” and it sounded like a made up name.

Or perhaps it’s an alias.

A reader points out that Cooter, as of last July, was facing aggravated burglary charges after allegedly climbing through the window of a woman’s apartment and getting into bed with her.

If true, even Ben Roethlisberger thinks the guy is an idiot.

But there’s more.  In 2006, Jim Bob was busted for DUI while he was a member of the University of Tennessee football team.  Also in the car with him was an underage female with an open container of alcohol.

So apparently the “privilege not a right” thing applies only to playing in the NFL, not coaching in it.

54 responses to “Meet Jim Bob Cooter

  1. hahahaha a burgler that wanted to cuddle……the bottle of alcohol was def his good friend jimmy beam………
    girl: what are you doing get out of my bed!!!!
    Cooter: shhhhhh i know payton manning its ok

  2. Sounds like he’ll be the perfect offensive assistant for a QB who dragged his rectum across the face of a female trainer.
    The Steelers have suddenly dropped to second place in the race for the team with the most disgusting male chauvinists/criminals.

  3. So apparently the “privilege not a right” thing applies only to playing in the NFL, not coaching in it.
    ————–
    Just a saying anymore. Never held any weight and sure doesn’t now.
    National Felon League never fit the NFL more.

  4. Also ticketed: An underage female companion, for underage drinking and having an open container. Not to worry, though: They’re cousins, it’s all fine.
    all in the family????
    Jim Bob Cooter? former UT QB? she must have volunteered …

  5. I don’t generally support racial profiling…..
    But when someone elects to go by 2 nicknames as their name, maybe don’t hire them. It’s all I’m saying.
    Aside from Billy Bob Thornton, it never works out well.

  6. Oh yeah!
    PITTSBURGH — Police say a man broke into a Pittsburgh home and climbed into bed with its owner, apparently because he was drunk and cold following a rap concert.
    Homeowner Frank Fontana says he was in bed when the man climbed in about 5:30 Wednesday morning. Fontana says he asked whether it was a woman who has keys to his home — and he grabbed a baseball bat when a deep male voice answered, “No, it’s not.”
    Police say Fontana kept the man at bay until police arrived but didn’t hit him with the bat.
    Police say the intruder told them he was looking for shelter after a Tuesday night concert by rapper Jay-Z at the Mellon Arena.
    The 33-year-old man faces a preliminary hearing on charges of criminal mischief and criminal trespass.

  7. Florio, please ask the NFL front office why he wasn’t disciplined for the burglary charges? He was employed by an NFL team at the time right?

  8. Stay classy,Colts. How did they miss out on Richie Incognito? With Marvin “the Shootist” Harrison out of the picture, I guess there is a big hole in the Colts organization that only something called Jim Bob Cooter could fill.

  9. So do the Colts bother to do any sort of background checks on their coaches? Or do they just not care if the guy is a drunken perverted hillbilly??

  10. No no no, Mr. Florio you must have Jim Bob Cooter confused with BOB JIM Cooter. I understand, it’s easy to get them mixed up.
    GOOOOO COLTS!!!

  11. Patrick I want my WWCD (What Would Cooter Do?) shirt back. I told you he would make it to the NFL conversation.

  12. girl: what are you doing get out of my bed!!!!
    Cooter: shhhhhh i know payton manning its ok
    —————-
    Ahaha I just lol’d all over myself

  13. Well Florio, I would bet you just cost this guy his job and the Colts some serious embarrassment. If only your reporting wasn’t so popular. Maybe you should still be a lawyer 😉

  14. I say give this guy a break. With name “Jim Bob” his parents are obviously terrible, heartless, soulless people. There’s no telling what they did to him. And with the last name “Cooter”, he’s been called “P—y” his entire life.
    If drinking with underage girls was illegal, we’d all be in jail. Am I right or am I right?!

  15. @ Florio,
    “If true, even Ben Roethlisberger thinks the guy is an idiot.”
    Clearly you don’t know much about Ben “Twice the subject of sexual assault allegations” Roethlisberger. He’d obviously admire the hell outta this “Jim” “Bob” “Cooter” guy.

  16. With Tom Moore and Howard Mudd gone the Colts will have serious issues next year, regardless of whether they have a coach by the name of jim bob cooter on the staff or not.

  17. girl: what are you doing get out of my bed!!!!
    Cooter: shhhhhh i know payton manning its ok

    Hilarious!
    From the Urban Dictionary
    cooter
    Most commonly associated with the friendly grease monkey character from the Dukes of Hazard. Now a slang term referring to the female sex organ.
    See also snatch pussy vagina
    Did you lick her cooter?

    My God! There is too much material here! And sadly…I have nothing.

  18. So, basically, if your local NFL team is hosting the Colts, or Steelers, you might want to ship your women to Canada for the weekend just to be safe…..

  19. BREAKING NEWS: Jim Bob Cooter just announced that he’s engaged to Tony Washington’s little sister. Seems she’s reminds him of being back home in Tennessee.

  20. Let’s see… Zeirlein (SP) the Steelers OL coach was ridiculed after a well publicized porno distribution no no…the Lions had a public nudie driving assistant coach who I believe was disciplined and again it was well publicized. The Raiders had Cable with his legal woes well publicized. The Cowboys had Wilson who was buying HGH I think because he couldn’t…uhh..perform and again well publicized and he was disciplined. But let the Colts have some turd and the only place we will ever hear about it is PFT. MAN I hate that sanctimonious bunch of hypocritical MFers (the Colts).

  21. Imagine the get-together, maybe at Peyton Place. Ron Mexico. Jim Bob Cooter. Peyton Manning. They would hang out for a bit, break into a dog apartment, drink with some underaged dogs, give them herpes, kill them, after a good rectum drag.
    Add Wishbone to the party. Hey, Wishbone, yes, drinking with underage girls is something we’ve all done. WHEN WE WERE UNDERAGE, you big goof, you.

  22. This guy has to be a Western PA product. With their high number of toothless, hillbillys and sexual predators in their population, Cooter has to be from Greensburg or Washington, PA or he could be from Findlay, Ohio.

  23. A hick from Tennessee called Jim Bob? I bet he is from West Virgina, makes moonshine and had a “date” with his sister a few times!

  24. As a Colts fan, I normally try to defend my team but……I’ve got nothing on this one.
    Carry on.

  25. Best name ever!! Irsay, please make him head coach and ship Caldwell’s carcas out of town!!

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