Nate Newton wastes away

Though a certain video in which Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo issues a kinda-sorta guarantee has been getting more attention, we’ve tripped across (thanks to the reader who threw it in our path) a video that should provoke a far more dramatic reaction.

Former Cowboys offensive lineman Nate Newton has lost more than 130 pounds since April.  If we didn’t know it was him, we wouldn’t have believed it was him.

Per the Dallas Morning News, Newton started at 396, and he currently weighs 263.  He hopes to get under 235.

Newton had 75 percent of his stomach removed on April 19, in a procedure called a vertical sleeve gastrectomy.

Nobody recognizes me,” Newton told the Morning News.  “Nobody knows me if I don’t open my mouth.”

Newton is one of the more notorious former members of the Cowboys teams of the 1990s.  In 2001, he was arrested twice with large amounts of marijuana in his vehicle.  The first time, he had 213 pounds.  The next time, the amount was down to 175. 

So, basically, this isn’t his first experience with weight reduction.

24 responses to “Nate Newton wastes away

  1. Wow.
    So this constitutes an attempt at humor by lil’ Napoleon Florio.
    None of this is funny, you little turd. That someone so obese feels the right choice is to have a “vertical sleeve gastrectomy” isn’t funny.
    That he got arrest not once but twice with huge amounts of weed…well, that wasfunny, at the time. But tying the two together for a ba-da-bing! punchline is proof positive that the off-season sucks and you, sir, are no comedienne.
    Please. For all of our sake, stop trying.

  2. Great googily-moogily. I had to skip ahead throughout the video just to make sure the guy at the beginning was Nate Newton and that a fatter guy didn’t appear halfway through. Crazy.

  3. I hate the Cowboys….but good for Nate Newton. One of the funniest commentaries ever on NFL on the TV was John Madden back in the day talking about the size of nate newton’s ASS…funny as hell, only Madden could get away with talking like that

  4. can anyone explain to me how the hell he isn’t currently in jail instead of appearing in videos on the internet?
    was he too fat to fit through the door?

  5. 115 pound of the weight loss was the stomach itself. Nate lost a further 15 pounds from not being able to eat as much as he used to. To get down to 235 from 263, Nate is going to have his left buttock removed.

  6. 400 pounds of ganja equates to about the same amount of “munchies” fat, from this example.

  7. Romo looked like serious business making that Super Bowl prediction.
    I love it. LET THE HATE FUEL YOU ROMO. COME TO THE DARK SIDE.

  8. maybe he was smuggling weed in his stomach all these years and is finally starting to liquidate inventory…

  9. robert ethen says:
    July 26, 2010 3:21 PM
    115 pound of the weight loss was the stomach itself. Nate lost a further 15 pounds from not being able to eat as much as he used to. To get down to 235 from 263,
    Nate is going to have his left buttock removed.
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    That’s why I look for your comments first!!!

  10. He had to lose weight, he can’t afford to eat that way since his drug empire came crashing down…

  11. “Nobody recognizes me if I don’t open my mouth”, states Nate. Then they roll their eyes and look at their watch.

  12. So he had an operation to lose his wieght (flexy Rexy), or was it all the marijuana he had in his stomach!

  13. How in the hell is this fatass even out of prison?
    I can promise you, if it was me or any other average joe and we were to get popped with almost 400 lbs of pot combined from 2 different stops, we’d be in prison right now.
    Gotta love the privileges that rich people are afforded that the rest of us aren’t…

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