Religious Roethlisberger won’t live with fiancee before marriage

AP

In one of the clearest signs yet of Ben Roethlisberger laboring to change his reputation, the Steelers quarterback has told a Pittsburgh newspaper that his religious beliefs preclude him from living with his fiancee.

Roethlisberger told Ed Bouchette of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette that his fiancee, Ashley Harlan, lives at home with her parents, and that the couple’s religious faith and beliefs are the reasons for not living together until marriage.

That’s quite a change for Roethlisberger, who developed a reputation as a womanizer over the first six seasons of his NFL career and who has twice been accused of sexual assault.

Now Roethlisberger says he’s a changed man, although he knows some people are skeptical of how much he has really changed.

“People will always have opinions of everybody and me, and that’s fine, they’re entitled,” Roethlisberger said. “But people who know her, know me, know us . . . people can say that it is whatever, but people who know and can see and are around us and know me, know that it’s something special when you find that person, and I’m extremely lucky.”

Roethlisberger’s wedding is scheduled for July 23. He says Harlan hopes the lockout will delay the start of training camp just long enough for a honeymoon.

138 responses to “Religious Roethlisberger won’t live with fiancee before marriage

  1. I read the headline and couldn’t stop laughing…I have a feeling the comments on this one are gonna be great.

  2. Ben doesn’t need to live with her. They rendezvous quite often in the restroom where they met.

  3. He wont live with her but I’m sure he will force her into a bathroom with his body guards in the back of sleazy night club. You can change but your reputation wont.

  4. Now… there is good re-imaging… i.e. Mike Vick, who has almost completely re-created his public image…

    And there is pathetic, everyone-look-at-me, re-imaging… i.e. Small Ben, who is REALLY reaching for people to view him differently

  5. Anyone else find it hypocritical that the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette is being critical of media scrutiny?

  6. Wow, how much more condescending can a high profile athlete act? I hope the NFL is disolved and these high profile athletes have to live in the real world for a while.

    Hotel employees are fair game because they are simply employees providing a service, God would be okay with it.

  7. Umm..can you guys read?

    Ben said his fiance’s parents’ religious beliefs are the reason that he is not living with his fiance, which he was respecting…

  8. When i read the headline suddenly my extremeties were unable to move….Getting so deep, can’t move……arghhhhh

  9. He’s always been religious and had the PFJ crap on his shoes and stuff.

    This, like that, is just him being completely hypocritical and also like that it is completely meaningless.

    GO STEELERS!

  10. joeyballgame4 says:
    Apr 7, 2011 8:53 AM
    miss out on one ring? try for another…

    ——–

    Well since he already has TWO rings…

    The Black and Gold will keep winning with Roethlisberger under center for the next 5-8 years. Stairway to Seven

  11. You can’t make stuff like this up. This will be the most commented story of the week for sure. And I bet half of the comments get pulled.

  12. Roethlisberger’s fiance is religious and trusts Roethlisberger? Take about one naive chick.

  13. You do realize that you made an entire article out of ONE line of the entire article, right? Most of the article was talking about his career and the changes he’s made, but you found the one line that may be controversial and grabbed onto it with all you had. Unreal.

  14. Although I despised Ben’s disgusting behavior in the past and thought the Steelers gutless for sticking with him, this is a positive sign.

    He still has a LONG way to to go towards repairing his image, if these comments are any indication.

  15. Translation:

    She probably has some legitimate standards and morals that he has no real choice but to respect if he wants to keep her.. Therefore he is trying to get some mileage out.

    This is truly amusing..

  16. Selective application of religious morals: God says I shouldn’t live with my fiancee before marriage. However, God is cool with rapin’ chicks in the bathroom.

  17. Im sure Ben is thinking that if he settles down all the thoughts about rape might go away and maybe it will keep him out of trouble. He is a sociopath this wont keep him entertained long. Most serial rapists are married and have children and just live seperate lives.

  18. So why does he need to disclose his living arrangements to the media? Good for him that he is following his faith and belief but it just seems like he is trying way too hard for the public to view him in a different light.

  19. being a Ravens fan, it is AWESOME to pick on Big Ben for anything under the sun, and this DEF fits that category with the hipocracy of it all lol, don’t get me wrong, he is a great QB for sure, especially when he’s playing the Ravens (grrr), but being only a year or so since this all happened im quite astonished she said yes, personally i would need some more time making a decision that big with someone whose been that shady and the complete opposite of everything i stood for, but go ahead Big Ben, i hope things go well, i always believe that everyone deserves AT LEAST a second chance at life, but there is no third for sure, Go Ravens!

    p.s. remember… No means NO! even if she already said yes! hahahaha

  20. These religious beliefs. this God who is worshipped, never have any sense of timing, he always arrives AFTER the fact…….Must be coincidence i assume…

  21. Trying to hide his character flaws behind religion….is he running for a Republican House seat?

  22. Is this the start of Big Bens yearly offseason drama…. “The accident”, “The Rapes”, … “The Wedding”. I can’t wait to see this one play out.

  23. A couple of my closest friends know the young lady and her family well. The gal is legit and very much respected – here’s to hoping that Big Ben will measure up.

  24. Big Ben is now the new dumbest member of the NFLPA* for thinking people will actually take this wedding thing seriously.

  25. um actually, joe6606, I can read, and the article says “the couples” beliefs, not the parents. Anyway, it should say her beliefs which are now his pretend beliefs . . . at least until after the ceremony . . .

  26. She’s 27 years old and lives with her parents??? Unless there’s some compelling reason for it like they are ill and she’s caring for them or something…that’s pretty sad.

    It sounds kind of hinky to me that first, it was presented in the story as she met him as a fan of the team at TC then he says oh we’ve been dating on and off/friends for 5 years…something seems off with this whole thing.

  27. Thanks for the laugh– I would have liked a warning of this headline before reading it at the same time I was drinking my soda— I have to clean-off my monitor now.

  28. You all are sick and so negative. Look at all the thumbs up to comments about rape and sex before marriage. You all are sick! Shame on you!

  29. Good for Ben and Ashley. It’s nice to hear about a positive off season story involving Ben on this site. I wish them the best of luck with their marriage.

  30. It’s hard not to smile at the headline a little…

    Anyway, for the sake of Deb I’ll take the high road and wish the young couple nothing but the best and I hope Big Ben has changed his life.

  31. Congratulations big Ben. He is doing something positive and very admirable. We should be happy that he is doing positive instead ofholding his past against him. He can’t change his past. I’m happy he is on the right path. What else can u ask of him. Bless you all.

  32. Diehard Steelers and Ben fan here…

    You guys are hilarious…Even though none of you haters read any police report on the Georgia matter.

    Ben was exonerated in Georgia. No DNA found, no rape committed.

    In Nevada, he countersuing and has refused to settle even for a paltry amount.

    Bu, if your ignorance gives birth to great humor, it’s worth it.

  33. Some athletes get a welcome second chance others have to battle the public while they take that second chance. Ben is the latter in this. Hopefully this is a sign of maturing and not a publicity stunt. Ben is young and has done stupid things but if he turns it around I support him.

    @gairzo, there is being a fan and than there is being a blind fan. Sure he wasn’t convicted but there was enough there to know something happened which is why the NFL found reason to punish him. Don’t be so naive.

  34. How ridiculous and ignorant!!

    Not Pig Ben; I mean religion. Pig Ben is just being true to his idiotic nature.

  35. Wow, look at all the judgment on this thread. I’m sure all of you guys are saints and the soul of honesty, right perv?

    @CKL …

    Where have you been? You need to check out some census stats. There’s nothing unusual about a 27-year-old living with her folks. I moved in with mine while my house was being built. Did it ever occur to you that her lease expired and rather than sign a new one, she moved in with the folks until the wedding. Jiminey Whiskers, talk about people looking for something to find fault with 🙄 But Ben should learn to keep his private life to himself. No one need to know where he sleeps.

  36. @bucky badger

    So you call me naive.. Not only was he not convicted, he was exonerated. They couldn’t find probable cause, dude.

    The Nevada skank was braggin’ about having his kid.

    You won’t see Goodell using Ben to institute his new “conduct policy” crap…

    Who’s blind and naive?

    We can agree Ben’s behavior was morally awful. We can agree it made him, the NFL, and the Steelers look bad.

    You call a man a rapist, that’s the second most serious charge in the book.

    There is not one bit of credible evidence the man raped anyone.

  37. @buckybadger …

    So you’ve read the case files, the evidence reports, the medical report, and Roger Goodell’s letter to Ben?

    Multiple witnesses had the woman pursuing Ben from club to club. They were alone less than 10 minutes. She was dragged to a cop and rape was alleged by a sorority sister Ben had personally thrown out of the party for ragging him about the Nevada accusation. That woman made up the bodyguard story, which was later refuted by multiple witnesses. The woman’s medical exam showed she did not have intercourse, so the story of vaginal rape–the only sex act she alleged–was a lie. Visit Milledgeville and ask around. Not one cop or prosecutor who worked the case thought the woman was credible.

    Goodell’s letter said NFL investigators didn’t find anything to contradict the police findings. BUT he was drunk and acting inappropriately so they suspended him anyway. Translation: THE MEDIA IS WATCHING.

    He became the first NFL player in history suspended without a single warning, arrest, failing any substance abuse test, or violation of any team policy. Later Vince Young was arrested for assaulting someone in a strip club and the commissioner did nothing. Why? The national media was not watching. Get a clue.

  38. @goombar2 …

    Hard not to whack yourself in the head and go “what is he thinking talking about this stuff???”

    Thank you for your restraint 😉

  39. Deb says:
    Apr 7, 2011 1:14 PM

    @CKL …

    Where have you been? You need to check out some census stats. There’s nothing unusual about a 27-year-old living with her folks. I moved in with mine while my house was being built. Did it ever occur to you that her lease expired and rather than sign a new one, she moved in with the folks until the wedding. Jiminey Whiskers, talk about people looking for something to find fault with

    ______________________________
    I said “unless she has a compelling reason”. A break between a lease and a wedding would be one I guess, but that’s a temporary situation and I was meaning permanent residence. I still maintain that permanent residence with parents at the age of 27 for no health reason is sad…and immature.

    By the way you do an awful lot of “eyerolling” at people all over this site for someone who leaps at calling people out for snark. 🙂

  40. And perv … the stuff I post–whether it’s about Roethlisberger’s legal issues or anything else–is true. Hey to Lidia.

  41. “People will always have opinions of everybody and me, and that’s fine, they’re entitled,”

    Says it all.

    And seriously?? A BUNGLES fan is piling on??? LOLOLOLOLOL

  42. @CKL …

    Since she’s leaving in July, obviously it’s not a permanent residence, now is it? Again, if you’ll check census records, it’s not unusual in 2011–especially in this economy–for adults that age, single and married with kids, to be living with their folks. In fact, that particular cultural phenomenon gets a lot of media coverage.

    Yeah, I’m probably overusing the eyeroll. I like using emoticon expressions and have a couple that would be more appropriate in some of these situations, but can’t get them to work here. So I just fall back on the few I know. 😎

  43. BTW, folks … in answer to the question about how many times “must we hear your stories” in defense of Roethlisberger (or anything else) … you’re all free to skip any post with my name on it. If you choose not to do that, don’t complain about having to read the case facts. You don’t hear me complaining about having to read your same old tired jokes on every thread.

  44. Wishing you nothing but the best, Ben. Be happy, and let’s get number seven ! See you at training camp.

  45. Deb says: Apr 7, 2011 1:27 PM

    @buckybadger …

    So you’ve read the case files, the evidence reports, the medical report, and Roger Goodell’s letter to Ben?

    Multiple witnesses had the woman pursuing Ben from club to club. They were alone less than 10 minutes. She was dragged to a cop and rape was alleged by a sorority sister Ben had personally thrown out of the party for ragging him about the Nevada accusation. That woman made up the bodyguard story, which was later refuted by multiple witnesses. The woman’s medical exam showed she did not have intercourse, so the story of vaginal rape–the only sex act she alleged–was a lie. Visit Milledgeville and ask around. Not one cop or prosecutor who worked the case thought the woman was credible.

    Goodell’s letter said NFL investigators didn’t find anything to contradict the police findings. BUT he was drunk and acting inappropriately so they suspended him anyway. Translation: THE MEDIA IS WATCHING.

    He became the first NFL player in history suspended without a single warning, arrest, failing any substance abuse test, or violation of any team policy. Later Vince Young was arrested for assaulting someone in a strip club and the commissioner did nothing. Why? The national media was not watching. Get a clue.
    ———————————————————–
    if I could click the thumbs up button as much as I wanted, I would be here all night.

  46. It’s almost 50 miles from New Castle to Pittsburgh. Maybe this young woman spends so much time at her job that it doesn’t pay to keep her own place. Maybe her parents count on her for something. So what. All you loser Ben haters just can’t stand the success he brings to the Steelers at your teams’ expense

  47. @mesoornery …

    Thank you. Obviously the truth hurts the haters, but I don’t mind getting slammed for telling the truth. Beats being a liar.

    I’m thinking of having a bracelet made to match my thumbs down collection 😉

  48. Ravens fans accusing Roethlisberger of hypocrisy is a hoot. Your franchise hero is smeared in blood and used religion to affirm that he too was a changed man.

  49. @halftermguv …

    Although I don’t believe Favre harassed Sterger, there’s also tremendous irony in the Vikes/Favre chief defender trolling this thread to rant about Roethlisberger being a pig. At least Ben was single when partying with the DTFs. And I don’t recall the Steelers taking any hooker cruises.

  50. I hope I never get so whack that I get a job becoming an apologist of a sex crazed QB. Any one with a brain knew I never defended Favre’s actions.

  51. This honestly is one of the funniest, most blatantly contrived things i’ve ever read. They dont live together b/c of Bens “religious beliefs”, yet they met in 2005 so that means at the very least his “religious beliefs” did not prevent him from sexually assaulting 3-4 women in that time frame. el oh el?

  52. Guess there’s nothing so satisfying as being a complete an total a** to a friend then setting off a chain reaction of hate toward that person as icing in the cake. Congrats, Bri. I would have let it go if you had.

  53. Oh shut up, perv. You’re not going to make me laugh about any of this. You’re not. Really.

    Stop it!

  54. But really, this should be a natural for Big Ben. He’s slept with a lot of married women.

  55. So you can’t live together because of your religious faiths and beliefs…

    But you can pull your junk out and flop it around?

    Nice.

  56. Here come the haters. Funny thing is most all the remarks are old and arent funny at all.
    Guess thats what happens when Big Bens a winner. 7 years in the league, 3 superbowl appearances, and 2 superbowl wins. Thats just the facts haters. He is also turning around his life for the better. Theres alot of teams in this league that havent been to a superbowl in a LONG TIME and Big will be will win another Count on it.

  57. How great to read some positive football news for a change! The interview/article appears in full in Thursday’s Pittsburgh Post Gazette. Best of luck to Ben and Ashley in the marriage and as they begin their life together. I’m sure I speak for many when I say – it’s time for the haters to move on, get a life and find a new target. Who hasn’t made some bad decisions at one time or another.

    So, here’s to Ben getting married in July and Hines winning Dancing with the Stars for the Steeler Nation.

  58. stairwayto7 says:
    Apr 7, 2011 5:33 PM
    Ben is not a cancer survivor hater liek Aaron Rodgers! And their is video proof of that!
    ————————-
    Perfect example of why people hate Steelers fans.

  59. Of course his fiance trusts him…I mean she believes in mythical creatures and fictional characters (God). She probably also believes that Pinnochio was real, that there was a wooden puppet that turned into a real boy.

    Why is it that so many smart people are dumb enough to believe in a book written thousands of years ago for the uneducated masses as a form of control?

  60. hgl4969 says: “Who hasn’t made some bad decisions at one time or another.”

    Since when is raping women just a bad decision? If that’s your standards I hope you don’t live anywhere near me!

  61. Cut the guy some slack. It’s pretty hard to live with somebody when they haven’t been shipped from Russia yet.

  62. As long as she stays out of hotel rooms in Vegas and bathrooms in Georgia, she’ll be fine.

  63. Easily some of the best comments I’ve ever read here. The comment section to this article was like a Comedy Central Roast.

  64. How cute, rapist to slave of oppressive organized religion. One idiotic move to another.

  65. LOL wow. Look at Deb in here white-knighting Pig Ben and his useless, livin-in-her-parent’s-basement-at age 27 fiancee.

    Keep trying to repair your soiled image, Pig Ben. You bought one superbowl ring, lucked into another, have somehow escaped being thrown in prison for rape, and you play for the Steelers. Your image is shot.

  66. What a fraud this guy is. What’s the over under on how long it takes ben to cheat on her (which is ok according to his beliefs)?

  67. deb: I’d like to say you are thick skinned, because you get destroyed anytime you utter anything about your precious Steeler’s. You have zero respect, and frankly, zero credibility. You are basically, a one woman pr commentor for “therapist”. But really, they refer to you as “big boned”.

  68. @luckywi …

    Oh. My. Gosh.

    Say it ain’t so, luckywi!!! I have zero respect and credibility from the teenagers on PFT. And you’ve discovered my secret: I’m “big-boned.” 😳

    Gasp!! Now my life has no meaning!

    Yes, maybe a therapist would help.

    Can you give me the name of yours? 😆

  69. If I were you guys, I’d be embarrassed to know I let through that original comment but wouldn’t print the good-natured response.

  70. Lets just hope the do not procreate , Pittsburgh is busting at the seams with waterhead mongoloids already. Can’t wait to see TMZ’s coverage of the bachelor party, that will be one for the ages. I just hope he doesn’t come back to Ohio to have the party, then I’ll have to lock up the daughters and the family pet.

  71. It took about half way through the thread before Deb let go. As Van Halen would say, “Rock On!”.

    Well, maybe Ben is trying to get it right this time? And since he and his betrothed are on the same page that’s all that matters. No doubt Ben is a different guy when ever he gets drunk just like all of you.

    “I did what I did until love came to town.”
    B.B. King

  72. @CKL

    I still maintain that permanent residence with parents at the age of 27 for no health reason is sad…and immature.
    *****************************

    I’m 31 in the Army I live in OK, but my Home of Record is my parent’s house in GA (i.e permanent residence). I pay GA taxes and update my GA driver’s license as required. Why? because every two years I’m moving somewhere new. And the Army says you must have Permanent home of record for accountability purposes. That being said, unless you are in that person’s shoes you have no idea why her permanent residence is with her parents. However, I can see that you can make ignorant statements on something you have no knowledge, that is unless you’re an expert on everyone’s living arrangements.

  73. Deb says:
    Apr 7, 2011 1:27 PM
    @buckybadger …

    So you’ve read the case files, the evidence reports, the medical report, and Roger Goodell’s letter to Ben?

    Multiple witnesses had the woman pursuing Ben from club to club. They were alone less than 10 minutes. She was dragged to a cop and rape was alleged by a sorority sister Ben had personally thrown out of the party for ragging him about the Nevada accusation. That woman made up the bodyguard story, which was later refuted by multiple witnesses. The woman’s medical exam showed she did not have intercourse, so the story of vaginal rape–the only sex act she alleged–was a lie. Visit Milledgeville and ask around. Not one cop or prosecutor who worked the case thought the woman was credible.

    Goodell’s letter said NFL investigators didn’t find anything to contradict the police findings. BUT he was drunk and acting inappropriately so they suspended him anyway. Translation: THE MEDIA IS WATCHING.

    He became the first NFL player in history suspended without a single warning, arrest, failing any substance abuse test, or violation of any team policy…..

    duece5 says:

    Deb, I understand you want to defend your QB. But if you re-read one of your last sentences, you will understand, FULLY, why people pile on BR. As you state, “He became the the first NFL player in history suspended without a single warning, arrest, failing any substance abuse test, or violation of any team policy….”

    So why did the guy get suspended?

    BECAUSE HE IS SO FREAKIN’ STUPID AND FULL OF HIMSELF, HE DIDN’T THINK HE WOULD BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR HIS ACTIONS!

    And, he WAS warned by Goodell prior—“to stay out of the limelight—don’t embarass the shield”.

    He did, and he paid a huge price to his reputation. For most people…forever….he is just a disgusting guy….I’m sure your’re proud of him.

  74. steelcurtainn says:
    Apr 7, 2011 10:46 PM
    Here come the haters. Funny thing is most all the remarks are old and arent funny at all.
    Guess thats what happens when Big Bens a winner. 7 years in the league, 3 superbowl appearances, and 2 superbowl wins. Thats just the facts haters. He is also turning around his life for the better. Theres alot of teams in this league that havent been to a superbowl in a LONG TIME and Big will be will win another Count on it.

    duece5 says:

    You are wrong black and gold breath….it isn’t funny for YOU. It is hilarious to all non-Steeler fans AND some Steeler fans. The dude is a mess. Yes, he helped win you Super Bowls–congrats. But, I have to admit, I am shocked he didn’t disintegrate on the spot the moment the guy mentioned himself AND religion. That dude will NOT change. Too early success, immaturity, and an attitude of entitlement, along with his desire to do it in bathrooms. Hey, I guess he found true love. He just shouldn’t confuse this mini-episode of not living together as trying to stay true to his “religous beliefs”. What are those by the way?? Really dude? The dude is DUMBER than I even thought, and that my friend, is HILARIOUS!!!! hey, if you want to talk super bowls fine. It’s funny, once you get to the heart of the argument, his lack of moral conscience, the more BR fans talk about super bowls because they can’t compete with the reality that BR is the biggest scum in the NFL. But, hey, he won super bowls!! Ya, i bet mom/dad are proud of him for his immoral ineptitude–THAT IS THE ARGUMENT HERE!!

  75. @duece5 …

    My reason for debating Ben’s case is because I’m a rape survivor and have been involved in these issues for years. I’m also a writer/researcher from a family of criminal defense lawyers and by chance have a good friend who worked Ben’s Milledgeville case. I have researched Ben’s legal cases from beginning to end as thoroughly as any reporter assigned to cover them.

    The hotel worker in Nevada sent text messages the morning after her one-niter with Ben telling friends she couldn’t wait to see him again. She obsessed over him so much for a year that her bosses asked her to take paid leave when he was scheduled to return so she would not have access to him. That’s when she freaked out and filed the civil suit for $3 million against him and her coworkers. Most guys in these cases settle to make the case go away. Instead, Ben has countersued for defamation, and the text messages she sent have been filed with the court. Police in that jurisdiction have said no one has ever filed a criminal rape complaint with them and they have no evidence a crime ever occurred.

    Multiple witnesses in Milledgeville said the woman in question pursued Ben from bar to bar while buying her own liquor on a fake ID. She repeatedly propositioned him in front of witnesses and tried to get him to return to her place. He declined, saying it was a lawsuit in the making. Her sorority sister began ragging him about the Nevada suit and he personally ejected her from the party. Later, he and the accuser were alone in the bathroom less than 10 minutes. The sorority sister who was ejected is the one who made the rape complaint, which the accuser repeatedly denied. She changed her story after pressure from her friend. The only allegation was vaginal rape, but the medical exam found they did not have intercourse … which means she lied. Witnesses also refuted the story of the bodyguard, which conflicted with the accuser’s written account of events.

    The DA said the sorority sisters’ accusations were fueled by alcohol and he hoped they learned their lesson. He also said there’s nothing to suggest that woman was paid anything. Since there was no evidence to bring charges with or without her cooperation, the only motive for Ben to pay her would have been to get her to recant the accusation. She hasn’t.

    Ben is a great QB, but he’s also an idiot. I hope he straightens out his life, but it doesn’t really matter to me as long as he just shuts up and plays.

    My concern is that law enforcement spend its time on real victims and real predators. I’m sickened by women who make false accusations for profit or revenge, which happens more regularly than most people realize. Ben brought a lot of his problems on himself by his own irresponsible behavior, but the medical exam in Georgia and the text messages Andrea McNulty sent in Nevada don’t lie. And despite the rumors and ranting of guys on PFT, those are the only two accusations that have ever been made against him.

  76. Right, so you go from sex offender to being engaged with a girl who still lives at home with her parents, and your religious beliefs preclude you from living together. ROFL-

    I have a huge inventories of bridges for sale if anyone is interested…….Seriously.

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