Three days after discovering “Moss TV,” the question remains whether I’ll lose interest in watching it before unretired receiver Randy Moss loses interest in doing it.
After last night’s one-hour-or-so excursion, I’m getting close to losing interest in whether he loses interest.
The novelty quickly is wearing off, even as Moss tries to change things up by using a piranha tank as his background or introducing new Klump-style characters, starting with his “brother” Jacob, who was Moss wearing Coke-bottle lenses and talking in a deeper voice.
Things could get a little more interesting (or a little less uninteresting) with Moss promising to do his next show from the Bahamas, where he’ll be vacationing with the “Wilforks” and the “Faulks” (presumably, former teammates Vince and Kevin and their spouses). And maybe Vince will be a guest on the show. And maybe it really will be Vince, and not Randy with a pillow under his shirt.
Anyway, here are a few of the very few noteworthy things Moss said last night.
1. He says he has “no clue” where he’ll play in 2012. “Let’s just keep our fingers crossed and wherever they fall, let ‘em fall,” Moss said. He later added that he’s “looking for a team that’s gonna want me to come in and do some damage.”
2. Moss said he thinks Bill Belichick is “the greatest coach in NFL history.”
3. Moss said he won’t be doing a made-for-TV workout, like T.O. did last season.
4. Moss said he “thinks” he ran a 4.3-second 40-yard dash on Wednesday, and that a “buddy” clocked him.
5. His fondest memory of Pats owner Robert Kraft is playing $1 liars poker in the locker room with him.
6. On the topic of Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh, Moss said that Suh needs to be in better control of his emotions, but Moss acknowledged that emotions sometimes get the better of a player. “I’ve squirted a damn referee before,” Moss said, referring to an incident from the 1999 playoffs against the Rams, when he squeezed the contents of a water bottle in the direction of an official.
7. Moss said that Darrelle Revis is the cornerback who gave Moss the most problems. And Revis apparently is the only one. “No one else gave me a problem in my NFL career,” Moss said.
8. Moss essentially promised double-digit scores in 2012. “I’m not coming to give you no seven, eight, nine touchdowns,” Moss said. “I’m coming to rock.”