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Saturday morning one-liners

Miami Dolphins v New York Giants Getty Images

Bills QB Ryan Fiztpatrick got a frank, candid critique of his 2011 season from new quarterbacks coach David Lee.

Dolphins RB Reggie Bush talks about the fast tempo of the team’s new offense.

Jets QB Tim Tebow defended the kid whose diploma was delayed because he Tebowed at graduation.

Patriots WR Brandon Lloyd may have had nothing to do with the disappearance of WR Chad Ochocinco’s cherished Starbucks card, but Lloyd already is on his way to taking Chad’s job.

Steelers LB Larry Foote is filling the leadership void created by the departure of James Farrior.

Ravens LB Brendon Ayanbadejo thinks the team’s special-teams will be the best yet under special-teams-coordinator-turned-head-coach John Harbaugh.

Newly-signed Bengals first-rounder Kevin Zeitler plans to buy something he’s never owned . . . a car; “The parking in Madison is crazy and expensive,” Zeitler said.  “It’s not worth it. When I went home I’d borrow my parents’.  Now I’ll be able to get one and pay some bills.”

Browns CB Sheldon Brown is trying to help his young teammates become responsible; “You have to make up your mind early and I think it’s important to be a professional,” Brown said.  “You can’t be one of the guys and be cool, this and that and make it in this league.  This is your livelihood.  This is how you support your family and friends and it’s very important that you’re held accountable to your teammates.”

Colts owner Jim Irsay says the team won’t be on HBO this year, we think; “We can’t be on Hard Knocks . . . we simply aren’t qualified 2b TV Stars!”

Texans owner Bob McNair says the city, not the team, should do the bulk of the work when it comes to luring the Super Bowl back to Houston.

Titans offensive coordinator Chris Palmer says RB Chris Johnson has been working hard in the offseason.

A legal fight is looming between Jacksonville and the Jaguars regarding the management of Everbank Field.

The Chiefs plan to change Dexter McCluster’s position designation from RB back to OW.

New Chargers defensive backs coach Ron Meeks is teaching not by telling but by showing.

Raiders CB Ron Bartell says he’s 100 percent following a 2011 neck fracture.

So much for reasonable expectations in Denver; Elvis Dumervil says, “It’s a big year for us as an organization.  We’re going for the ‘ship.”

The good news?  The folks at the Cowboys’ officials website have identified 10 position battles to watch in Dallas.  The bad news?  They present it in the always-annoying multi-click slideshow format.

Redskins G.M. Bruce Allen has been visiting with fans, and they all want to know about is the man known as RG3.

Giants defensive coordinator Perry Fewell calls CB Brandon BingBada,” something Bing has likely never heard before . . . especially in New Jersey.

So far, QB Mike Kafka is the clear choice for No. 2 in Philly.

The Vikings have more time at training camp this year because the dorms in which the team stays will be demolished after the Vikings leave.  (There’s a Love Boat joke lurking in there, somewhere.)

Now that he’s won Dancing With The Stars, Packers WR Donald Driver will try to cash in, off the field.

Lions P Ryan Donahue is ready to fend off Australian Ben Graham.  (“That’s not a kick . . . that’s a kick.”)

Bears LB J.T. Thomas could have drug charges dropped before the regular season starts.

Panthers coach Ron Rivera thinks “the sky may be the limit” for QB Cam Newton.

Falcons OL Justin Blalock has partnered with the Atlanta Symphony.

Saints DT Akiem Hicks hopes that his unconventional route to the NFL will make him a better player.

Second-year TE Luke Stocker is getting a much better chance to prepare for football season.

49ers LB Patrick Willis and WR Randy Moss fish when they wanna fish.

Cardinals DE Calais Campbell tells PFT Live that getting big money won’t change his game.

New Seahawks DT Jaye Howard credits former Seahawks defensive line coach Dan Quinn for improving Howard’s pass-rushing skills.

Rams WR Brian Quick missed his flight back to St. Louis from the Rookie Premiere because he was wearing his headphones.  (Maybe he really is another T.O.)

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6 Responses to “Saturday morning one-liners”
  1. jimcaldwellsucks says: May 26, 2012 10:10 AM

    When will Tebow understand that 75% of the people that are Tebowing are making fun of him?

  2. tfbuckfutter says: May 26, 2012 10:20 AM

    Not putting a stop to show boating is what lead to all this primadonna-look-at-me crap amongst wide receivers.

    I have no problem with the school stopping it before it got started.

  3. cuda1234 says: May 26, 2012 11:35 AM

    Ryan Fitzpatrick is from Harvard, has a long-term multi-million dollar contract and threw for 4,000 yards last year. David Lee coached the Miami Dolphins qb’s the last few years. Who’s teaching whom?

  4. stevenfbrackett says: May 26, 2012 12:38 PM

    Donald Driver could make a fortune in advertising. But I have a feeling that even though he could go the Payton Manning route and promote anything and everything – he already has successful regional campaigns behind him for companies like McDonalds – I think he’ll be a lot pickier, since most of the ads we see from him are PSAs.

    He could also be one of the few ex-players that would do very well in broadcasting. That may just come down to how much he wants to travel and/or whether he wants to relocate and to where.

    Just don’t go to ESPN, D. You are way too classy for that organization.

  5. TheJStyles says: May 26, 2012 2:13 PM

    “The good news? The folks at the Cowboys’ officials website have identified 10 position battles to watch in Dallas. The bad news? They present it in the always-annoying multi-click slideshow format.”
    ——
    Take THAT BleacherReport…

  6. dccowboy says: May 27, 2012 8:52 AM

    RGIII has, through no fault of his own, the most hyped rookie QB in NFL history. You can’t read the ESPN, CBS, FOX, website or listen to Sirius NFL radio without getting almost hourly updates on RGIII. I feel for the kid, he has expectations laid on him that are so high he can’t help but be seen as a failure, no matter how good he really turns out to be.

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