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Fred Davis is representing himself in a bizarre lawsuit

Fred Davis AP

It’s the Summer of Law for the NFL, and the latest piece of legal news relates to a fascinating case that somehow has remained off the radar screen for more than a year.

Redskins tight end Fred Davis was sued in early 2011 by Makini Chaka, a 33-year-old self-described “celebrity broker,” who says she organizes parties for famous people.  Luke Mullins of the Washingtonian tells the story of the litigation and its various twists and turns, including the fact that Davis has been acting as his own lawyer.

And it shows.

It’s just all made up and flagellant,” Davis told the judge during an April 10 hearing.

Chaka, who also is representing herself, claims Davis dumped juice on her head and busted her lip at a D.C. nightclub.  She also has accused Davis in court documents of assaulting, harassing, and threatening to kill her.  Chaka obtained a temporary restraining order in January 2011, which she has since claimed Davis violated.

The court proceedings have included Davis accusing Chaka of procuring prostitutes, an allegation Chaka has denied.  The April hearing featured an exchange regarding whether Chaka has her hand on a man’s genitals in a photograph.

Davis: “As it shows, you also have your hand on his genitals. I mean why would you take a picture like that?”

Chaka: “I do not. Let’s look closely at the exhibit right here, Judge. Where is my hand placed in this exhibit?”

Judge: “I do not answer questions. . . . The witness does.”

Chaka: “Can you tell me where my hand is actually at in this photo?”

Davis: “It looks like it’s in the genitals to me. I mean your hands are on his genitals. Your hand is on his –”

Chaka: “Objection.”

It’s unclear why Davis, who signed a one-year franchise tender earlier this year with the Redskins, doesn’t have a lawyer.  Though it may not be the smartest move Davis ever made, it’s sure to provide even more entertainment as the litigation continues to unfold.

Trial is set for March 11, 2013.  Here’s hoping that one of the litigants requests a change of venue to the courtroom of Judge Sapp.

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43 Responses to “Fred Davis is representing himself in a bizarre lawsuit”
  1. blackqbwhiterb says: Jun 28, 2012 11:41 PM

    Must have been a law major at USC

  2. msclemons67 says: Jun 28, 2012 11:41 PM

    It sounds like the NFL should drug test Davis again right away. He has to be stoned out of his mind.

  3. Neftali Ramos says: Jun 28, 2012 11:44 PM

    Reading the transcript of the trial was awesome! It’s like something out of a comedy movie.

  4. t16rich says: Jun 28, 2012 11:45 PM

    Hahahahahaha. This story made my night. ““As it shows, you also have your hand on his genitals. I mean why would you take a picture like that?” Fred Davis, you just went up a few notches in my book. Defending yourself and bringing that evidence to the court is genius and hilarious.

  5. duncanthecat says: Jun 28, 2012 11:55 PM

    He doesn’t need a squirmey lawyer. He’s doing just fine.

  6. dandrol says: Jun 28, 2012 11:57 PM

    Fred Davis isn’t exactly Anthony Hopkins in Fracture…

    I feel sorry for the judge for having to sit through this “let’s pretend you’re a lawyer” day.

  7. jchap00 says: Jun 28, 2012 11:58 PM

    Hey Florio, how about you brush off some rust and give Fred Davis a hand??? Sure would be more interesting than about 95% of the stories that have been rolling through!

  8. sabatimus says: Jun 29, 2012 12:00 AM

    And I thought the Onion was funny.

  9. waitingguilty says: Jun 29, 2012 12:01 AM

    One reason this has stayed out of the news for a year is that the Redskins beat writers spend more time at the Ashburn Dunkin Donuts than they do at Redskins Park.

  10. whodatgirl1 says: Jun 29, 2012 12:03 AM

    That makes for a good laugh.

  11. jaimelh02 says: Jun 29, 2012 12:09 AM

    Wow this is awesome!!! You couldn’t write a better script in a comedy movie haha

  12. damnskins703 says: Jun 29, 2012 12:10 AM

    Fred Davis is a beast

  13. paleandpasty says: Jun 29, 2012 12:11 AM

    Chaka is just looking for a payday. To think I used to be a huge Chaka fan on Land of the Lost till i read this; not anore.

  14. soundslikehail says: Jun 29, 2012 12:15 AM

    Haha, precious! they might be guerrilla auditioning for a reality show. objection!

  15. shzastl says: Jun 29, 2012 12:15 AM

    Hilarious! Must be frivolous if no pi lawyer will take her case on contingency

  16. truthfactory says: Jun 29, 2012 12:22 AM

    Wow, I wonder how its possible for 75% of these geniuses to be bankrupt after they’re done playing…

  17. DawgPound83 says: Jun 29, 2012 12:31 AM

    why do stupid people have money

  18. dryzzt23 says: Jun 29, 2012 12:32 AM

    What a flaming idiot Davis is

  19. icdogg says: Jun 29, 2012 12:34 AM

    Judge Sapp? Anyone else picturing Warren Sapp with a robe, gavel, and one of those funny wigs like they have in England?

  20. jetsetfred says: Jun 29, 2012 12:38 AM

    Erection I mean objection….

  21. thegreatgabbert says: Jun 29, 2012 12:48 AM

    She had her hand on his “objection!”. It was a huge, throbbing, objection as well.

  22. thegreatgabbert says: Jun 29, 2012 12:48 AM

    Fred calls it all “flagellant”. He is sick and tired of being the whipping boy here.

  23. thestillcity says: Jun 29, 2012 12:49 AM

    You guys didn’t catch the funniest part.

    ‘Flagellant’ is a noun, meaning: “A person who subjects themselves or others to flogging, either as a religious discipline or for sexual gratification.”

    Sounds like other stuff was going on at this party, or Davis is trying to use words he doesn’t know.

  24. donny1rodriguez says: Jun 29, 2012 12:56 AM

    man can this offseason get any better???

  25. thegreatgabbert says: Jun 29, 2012 12:59 AM

    Fred has a fool for a client. But luckily he is defending that fool against a complete idiot.

  26. thegreatgabbert says: Jun 29, 2012 1:06 AM

    Makini Chaka, Celebrity Broker, Ball Breaker, Inc.

  27. triangletaddler says: Jun 29, 2012 1:54 AM

    Jason Witten and Brent Celek are not this awesome.

  28. graham4jc says: Jun 29, 2012 2:17 AM

    You just can’t make this stuff up.

    As a Skins’ fan, I am equally embarrassed and entertained.

  29. veence69 says: Jun 29, 2012 2:52 AM

    I know you’re reading PFT, Fred. You’re just the type who would. I’m glad you are, because it gives me this opportunity to let you in in a secret the rest of us already know:

    You’re a joke. You always have been, and in 3 years when you’re a bankrupt mess, you’ll be an even bigger joke.

  30. fdugrad says: Jun 29, 2012 3:36 AM

    It is sad to find this tawdry story in such close proximity to the one about Joe Delany…. truly cringe-inducing.

  31. randallflagg52 says: Jun 29, 2012 4:08 AM

    This seems like something out of Catch-22. It seems so outlandish that it can’t possibly be real, yet sadly it is…

  32. angryamericancitizen says: Jun 29, 2012 5:16 AM

    Something tells me the ‘skins are already looking for Davis’ replacement for 2013.

  33. savannahrose44 says: Jun 29, 2012 5:44 AM

    Forget Sapp this is Judge Judy material right here.

  34. NFLJunkie says: Jun 29, 2012 6:10 AM

    This was definitely good enough to click on the link for the full story. I may stop laughing by lunchtime.

  35. bcjim says: Jun 29, 2012 7:02 AM

    Now this is good stuff, pft. Well done. And funny. How could the local sports talk hacks have missed this gem. I listen daily to local DC radio and this is news to me.

  36. worldwidebleater says: Jun 29, 2012 7:02 AM

    Your Honor, The Defense would like to recess to rip a bongload and to take a quick nap.

  37. sdcfaninaz says: Jun 29, 2012 7:25 AM

    Best read I’ve had on this site in a while. Still laughin’…

  38. httr73 says: Jun 29, 2012 7:44 AM

    This is exactly why you keep Cooley around for one more year even if his cost is a little higher than it should be. It’s also why you hit Fred with the fanchise tag b/c even though he may not be worth the $5+ million we are paying him this year, it’s far better than being locked into a long term deal with this character.

  39. snowpea84 says: Jun 29, 2012 8:06 AM

    This is pretty funny.

  40. urfinished says: Jun 29, 2012 8:20 AM

    That was the best thing I have ever read

  41. jmsincla says: Jun 29, 2012 9:00 AM

    I have no idea why most skins fans want to dump Cooley and put their faith in Davis.. The guy just doesn’t think stuff through.

  42. jwreck says: Jun 29, 2012 9:45 AM

    triangletaddler says: Jun 29, 2012 1:54 AM

    Jason Witten and Brent Celek are not this awesome.
    ____________
    Plus, the Redskins have Cooley. Say what you will about Gronkowski and Hernandez being the best tight end tandem in the NFL, Washington clearly has the most entertaining tight end duo in NFL history.

  43. therealsmiley says: Jun 29, 2012 10:50 AM

    Fred, do your self a huge favor and put a real attorney on this skank. And then countersue her for lying. Hail!

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