Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo took a graceful and measured approach to refuting the Maryland politician who wants to light his tailgating grill with the United States Constitution.
Vikings punter Chris Kluwe has taken a different path.
Ayanbadejo said he was “surprised” that Maryland House of Delegates member Emmett C. Burns Jr. would try to put pressure on the Ravens to silence his support of gay marriage, which is a ridiculous affront to free speech regardless your thoughts on the issue.
So Kluwe initially took a flame-thrower to Burns on Deadspin, a hilarious rebuke that you should only click if you’re not easily insulted by REALLY SALTY LANGUAGE.
It’s worth the read assuming you’re NOT REALLY SENSITIVE TO THAT KIND OF THING, since Kluwe hits you between the eyes with a 2×4 of profanity in the headline.
But in case you’re a bit more delicate, he also wrote a clean version for a blog hosted by the St. Paul Pioneer Press.
He admits he heard from several people, including his dad, who suggested his greater point might have been missed amid the swear words and references to private parts.
So he replaced some of the vulgarity with phrases such as “BEAUTIFULLY UNIQUE SPARKLEPONY” and “DELICIOUS STATE FAIR HOTDOG!”
Which, when you’re mocking a narrow-minded, wide-mouthed politician, is just as funny as the original, and maybe more so.
So again we say, good for Ayanbadejo for having a conscience and the willingness to voice it, and to Kluwe for having a sharp sense of humor.