Help us decipher this tweet from Jim Irsay

Late last night and/or early this morning, Colts owner Jim Irsay hunt-and-pecked a tweet directed at yours truly.

But, like many of Irsay’s tweets, I don’t really understand it.

It’s apparently a belated response to my fair-and-balanced assessment of his Saturday boast that the Colts had engaged in a free-agent “pillaging.”  Still, I’m not quite sure what Irsay is saying.

At least I understand the part where he breaks out a third-grade pun (in fairness, that’s the usual education level of my own puns) and calls me “Floor Sweeper” (in fairness, to a billionaire who nevertheless was able to finagle taxpayer money for his new stadium we’re all floor sweepers).

So help me decipher what exactly Jimbo is saying here.  Because I can’t make much sense of it.

136 responses to “Help us decipher this tweet from Jim Irsay

  1. I wouldn’t waste any time on this, Florio. Irsay’s become a cartoon. He’s just a dog (billionaire dog at that) that likes to bark.

  2. It’s hard to build up a ton of regard for a guy who’s exactly as “self-made” as Paris Hilton.

  3. Sounds to me like he’s getting ready to get Luck some weapons on offense. His grammar is all over the place and makes very little sense, but he refers to a WR and 160 mil, if he spreads it around and gets creative, the Colts might be on to something

  4. He saying that you are a “janitor’ compared to him and that you should take beginner classes in valuating talent

    No idea what he’s talking about $160 mil but I assume that he was already “lit up” with booze

  5. He is mad that you don’t agree that he pillaged the FA market, and seems to believe that the amount of money spent backs his claim (even if it wasn’t all well spent).
    Apparently he will be right (point fingers and tweet “I told you so”) that he did pillage the FA market once a new wide receiver catches a ball from Luck.

  6. Drunk like his old man! Do you really need to dig deeper than that! In the end Baltimore really won by having this idiot family out of town and now having the BEST OWNER IN FOOTBALL Stevie B running things in Charm City!

    BLACK AND PURPLE

  7. You got me. I can’t understand any of it. The childish dish at the beginning is the only part of that tweet that makes half a sense. I also noticed that he didn’t have the balls to mention you with your handle either….

  8. All I can ever think of when hear about Irsay is that he gave 16 MIL to Erik Walden! Still dumbfounded. I think he must’ve be chumming around with Matt Millen one night getting drunk and discussed how awesome he was.

  9. Just ignore him Florio, he’s just boasting on being able to spend $160 million on a bunch of underachieving chumps.

  10. If the receiver he is talking about is DHB, he will see him drop, disappoint, and disappear a lot more than he sees him catch the football from the QB. They should call him Darius Heyward-Butterfingers

  11. Looks very similar to a George W. Bush thought, or not.

    His thumbs should be penalized.

  12. I’m a little rusty, but I think it’s Spoiled Brat for “I’m an out of touch D-Bag” or Out of Touch D-Bag for “I’m a spoiled brat.”

  13. Jimmy boy…. Put down the scotch and step away…
    In the old days, drunk billionaires didn’t have smart phones to sound stupid with.
    They had to sound stupid in private.

  14. I think he was referring to your remarks about their free agent signings with his remarks about “160 mil.” I think he took offense when you said this was hardly pillaging. The wide receiver comment was probably about the fact that you said he did not land the free agent receiver he was alluding to in his previous tweets.

  15. You can just look at the guy and tell he is a lush. Look at his nose. It is always more bloodshot than his eyes. Nothing like living of of daddy’s money..

  16. Hilarious that he’s calling a self-made attorney and website millionaire a “floor sweeper.” We can’t all inherit billion dollar businesses whose values were established not by anything we did, but by decades of work by other people in the league and in the TV industry. Did your family do anything but screw Baltimore?

  17. You need help deciphering that? Just blast him if you want to blast him (he deserves it), but no need to act like you don’t know what he’s trying to do and how douchy he looks doing it. Go ahead…put him on blast, no need to worry about the wrath of the league…the other owners want you to.

  18. This man is very difficult to relate to. He inherited a billion dollar asset and yet drinks his face off and talks like a drunk fan in the 700 level while talking down to everyone. Florio keep pressing on this and let’s see if richie rich puts down his drink for his next tweet if/when the mainstream media pick it up.

  19. Sounds like he is going after another WR and that he is happy to have the extra million in cap space provided by the Redskins and the Cowboys.

  20. He may be stupid, but he suckered 31 other owners when he tanked the non-Manning season to acquire Luck in last years’ draft.

  21. He’s upset that you pointed out that he was bragging about the acquisition of a receiver that never happened. When he says “maybe 160 mil. is chump change 2U” he’s saying that landing big-time receivers isn’t as easy as you think and they’re expensive. Then he goes on to say that DHB will do fine too as long as he catches the ball.

  22. I’m glad the Colts were moved out of Baltimore, otherwise we’d be stuck with this halfwit.

  23. Thank god for Jim. He takes all the eyes off of the owner of my favorite team. I’m just waiting for Jerry to do something big and stupid to take the shine off of jimmy lol

  24. Jim, I hope you read this:

    your free agent class is a complete joke, and you are a joke too..Landry has the brain and intelligence of a 5 year old, and he will soon break down b/c of an overload of steriods and GH…Goster Cherilus?? LOL..he is HORR, only played decent during a contract year, and is a matt millen draft pick..DHB, another joke, cant catch, wasnt even an All-ACC pick, 1st or 2nd team, in college and was drafted by Al Davis..list goes on and on..

    Jim, I hope you die on Xmas day, under the tree, and your grandchildren find you and ask, “what happened to grandpa”

  25. Mike isnt this the same guy whose family and himself snuck his NFL franchise out the back door in the middle of the night. so who cares what he thinks his credibility is shot as far as im concerned. except for the fact i am so happy he ripped the team from balimore. dislike pigeons so much i hope they leave crab cake city too. but anyway they “athletes owners front office agents” the whole shabang they are against your regular journalist or reporters. there is no respect there so why care what some guitar toten hippy stoner owner thinks. i wouldnt. nevertheless get him Mike get him

  26. I get the Colts free agent signings to roughly $114m of total contracts, so I’m not sure what the $160m refers to. The total amount the Colts have committed to spend this year from salaries and bonuses?

  27. It’s ugly when an owner starts doing more than is needed and becomes the face of the franchise isn’t it?! Sigh….

  28. The guys who broke the Enigma Code in World War II would have a tough time figuring out what the hell Irsay was tweeting about you, Florio.

    I have to agree with the guys above who said it was obviously a drug and alcohol tweet coming from a billionaire who never learned the rules of capitalization or grammar.

  29. It’s nice to see that someone is ready to take the place of the elderly Bud Adams. The new court jester of the Billionaire Boys club. Florio, he’ll keep getting you page views. That’s the point anyway, isn’t it?

  30. Irsay, it says right on the bottle NOT to mix alcohol with your Viagra. It lowers the blood pressure to your brain dude and you end up tweeting while experiencing a mental brownout.

  31. I believe he is insinuating that he will pay you 160 million to teach his new fumble handed wr how to do his next job when he burns all the money jimmy is paying him and blows out of the league in 5 years.

    the only respectable response my janitorial friend, is to quote the best corner in football:

    “hey jimmy, I’m better at life than you”

  32. Oh snap! Seriously, Irsay is like Tommy Boy, only the NFL is so strong financially you have to be practically comatose to lose money. Or Art Modell. At least he spelled your name right. And in big capital letters like in his Big Chief Tablet.

  33. I think he was in essence saying his hard dollar payroll is 160 mil (his cap number is less) and he was referring to his prize gem (Luck) executing a brilliant passing game. An offense he built far quicker than anyone would have guessed. He may have tipped a few, but even drunk he isn’t stupid. I’m not a Colts fan and have never been one, but after he built the team he built after dumping Peyton and his front office team, I have to take my hat off to him. He knows how to own and manage an NFL team, many owners would benefit from a course or two from him. Including my team’s owner Steve Ross (not stupid either).

  34. I’m not a twitter guy but when you look at that Irsay profile, why would you post pictures of yourself that make you look like a drunk bum in someone else’s house?

  35. Upon reading the post I immediately thought of the Drunk or Stoned skit on the drive-time radio program (DJ recounts humorous case from police files and caller has to guess if the perpetrator was drunk or stoned). I see by the comments I wasn’t the only one. A quick review has the current count at 11 drunk, 4 stoned, 1 both, and 1 retarded. Should probably make this a standard poll for any Irsay tweet. Oh, put me down for drunk.

  36. Irsay is the perfect example of why famous people need to stay away from social media platforms such as Twitter.

  37. Dear Florio – it is a distinguished name, I admit, but one whose cachet you are unworthy of. I dub thee “floor sweeper” instead. You, being a man of wealth and taste, clearly have no appreciation of how far 160 million US dollars can take one of the upper middle class plebeians like myself.
    On a related note, in the game of American Football, it is the appointed task of a Wide Receiver to catch passes, which are thrown by the Quarterback. Any other activities are necessarily ancillary to his primary duties. Take this pamphlet, it is all explained in full, with small words and brightly colored photos.
    Yours Truly,
    Jim Irsay

    P.S. Knibb High Football Rules!

  38. ps: irsays late night tweets of high profile fa acquisitions are typically as real as Mantei’s girlfriends.

    they say that owners are the biggest BACKers of their team. Indy is the number one example of this. this guy truly is the BACK end of a young horse.

  39. “I’m an illiterate jackass, with no personality, no real friends, no one that loves me for ME… I just have a lot of money that my daddy left me. Otherwise, I’m lower than most on the totem pole.”

  40. what a drunk POS! that had 2 be it..he makes the colts org look terrible.. he should get a breathalyzer installed in his phone so he has to blow into it before he uses twitter loll

    calling people floorsweepers but he didnt work a day in his life for a penny he has in his account.. irony

  41. Florio,

    I couldn’t make any sense of it either. On a hunch, I had it translated to German, then translated it back to English and this is what I got:

    “Bodenkehrer, perhaps 160 painted is sees. zombie change that a receiver catches new wider the soccer of the beginner courses of the QB, there”

    So you see, it all becomes clear now. Take it easy, Bodenkehrer.

  42. When I would see interviews with Jim I would think that he did not seem like nearly as much of a jackass as his father. This was before Twitter was invented.

  43. He was trying to say “face”. Doesn’t matter that he doesn’t get your point. More so;, doesn’t matter that you don’t get his.

  44. 5:20am…

    Methinks he started typing just after 2am, and it took him a bit to get the phrasing juuuuuusssssttt riiiiiiight.

    That or we’re looking at the best butt-tweet EVAR.

  45. Who’s worse as a child heir(ess) Jim Irsay, son of Bob, or anyone with the last name Kardashian?

    Who has less talent as a child heir(ess) Jim Irsay, son of Bob, or anyone with the last name Kardashian?

  46. Irsay should turn interpreting his tweets into a contest like he does for Super Bowl predictions.

    -QG

  47. Here’s the translation:

    “Mike……can I come to New York to marry you since it is legal there? Yours always! Jim”

  48. johnnythek1 says:
    Apr 2, 2013 12:32 PM
    Florio,

    I couldn’t make any sense of it either. On a hunch, I had it translated to German, then translated it back to English and this is what I got:

    “Bodenkehrer, perhaps 160 painted is sees. zombie change that a receiver catches new wider the soccer of the beginner courses of the QB, there”

    So you see, it all becomes clear now. Take it easy, Bodenkehrer.

    Post of the year!

  49. I kinda like that he is so “open” to using Twitter and kinda leaks information. Personality and presence from an NFL owner is kinda refreshing from most of the other old-money stale owners.

    That being said, being a wealthy older man and taking personal shots at a “media source” for critiquing his teams’ acquisitions and use of the word pillaging is rather childish. I guess the “win” goes to you Florio, for instead of responding to him directly, you open it up to all of us to bash him. Well played sir…

  50. Irsay is flat out a dumb guy and he’s shown his low level of intelligence for years. Remember, this guy inherited the team from his dad so it isn’t like he is a self-made guy and thus one would assume he has a higher level of intelligence.

  51. It was an auto-correct typo from his iPhone. He meant he was 160 milliliters into his current bottle of booze.

  52. Yeah Irsay really pillaged the market for Erik Walden and DHB. Only had to fight off several contenders from the Canadian Football League for their services

  53. $160 million is “chump change” to FLORIO?

    Hardly. Let’s remember, this is a guy who has his $100,000 a year PR guy issue a self-congratulating press release every time he gives $10,000 to some cause to grab a headline.

    That’s the equivalent of $1.75 to you and me.

    Meanwhile, he wouldn’t THINK of selling off is $2.75 million original manuscript of “On the Road” and giving that to charity.

  54. OK,

    Seems simple enough.

    The “floor sweeper” crack was an obvious weak pun on your last name, Florio, as you rightly surmised.

    The reference to chump change is clearly a statement to counter your assertion that their off-season spending has been frugal. He feels he’s spent quite a bit.

    And then the final bit about there being a wide receiver relates to your criticism of that not having been addressed in the off-season.

    Basically, he’s saying that you are to be belittled because he’s spent a lot where you said he had not, got a wide receiver though your statement assumed that wasn’t addressed or planned by him, and that you have a lot to learn about being a GM that he can teach you.

    Perhaps that’s a worthy investment. Being frugal, his classes probably come at a reasonable price!

  55. Everyone is bad mouthing Irsay, which I understand. However, me being a Colts fan, I just have to say I kind of like it. He keeps the fan base notified of what he and the front office are trying to do. Other teams may find it annoying and dumb, but we have gotten some great acquisitions this offseason. Landry, DHB, Cherilus, and Toler are fantastic players. As for us tanking the 2011 season to get luck….I am glad he did, it’s better than the QB’s available this draft, or in most drafts for that reason. Say what you want about him being a drunk traitor and acquiring a fortune from his family, but he knows how to put the players in place to win.

  56. After your done cleaning his toilet, and you learn the beginners course… he wants to take you out for the main course and maybe dinner and cuddle sext with you! FLOORIO(JI should have used that! #FLOORIO (Trademark pending!)

    Obivous he has a crush on you, and loves to text with you like a 13 year old girl. He is teasing you and calling you out cuz he is really in love with you!

    So be honored that JI cares enough to DRUNK Tweet about U!!

  57. 1) I’m having a stroke. Please call 911.
    2) I have a twitter account, and my PR team is asleep.
    3) Please allow me to demonstrate the responsible use of twitter for my less sophisticated pro athletes
    4) Tim Tebow, Manti Te’o’s girlfriend, Jets, Farve and other words that will get me retweeted.
    5) I own an NFL team, so whatever I say.

  58. It’s been a number of years since I had to translate Irsayese.
    But I think he’s saying-
    It’s my goshdanged team (hic) Not your goshdanged team, (hic) If I say we’re pillaging (burp) then we’re pilliaging (hicburp) Get Elsway inshere. He’ll telsya I’m taking after mah daddy (hic) and pillaging like a good Irshay (burp). Getsh me another Boursshbon there Hinton.

  59. Just a chip off the old block. Either drunk, stoned, or drugged before dinner. He is an utter embarrassment to the NFL

  60. He is comparing your job to a janitor, spend 160 mill on new wr crew who will be the best in NFL. don’t agree however that is his thinking.

  61. Notice Jim, you are only holding one trophy. Any decent owner would have had enough pieces around a QB like Manning to win at least 2. I say you (in this order) get rid of the mullet (1992 called and they said they want it back), get off the drugs (whatever they may be prescription or not), get off the booze, STOP TWEETING. You make the entire fan base look like fools when you tweet and then have a picture like that of yourself sitting in your daddy’s chair pretending to ????make out with the Lombardi???? What a shameful picture. You are definitely the most disturbed person in Indiana.

  62. Since irsay is so rich AND dumb, maybe he could pay a bunch of other drunk bums to come to the site and give him some more thumb downs on the comments

  63. Well, dammit.

    I have been the biggest supporter of Irsay on this site and I think with good reason but…damn.

    I know the man is sober but even I doubted that after this recent hissy fit.

    Jim, I love you for doing great things for my Colts but please shut up until after the draft.

  64. I choose not to look down on people who aren’t on coke, crack, meth, steroids, HGH, and the only jobs I look down on are prostitutes and drug dealers/gangsta rappers so I wouldn’t comment on the “floor sweeper” part. Clearly Irsay is drunk and obviously he thinks Florio is a bad wide receiver and he is right, you are probably not currently a very good option inside or outside.

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