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Kellen Winslow: I was just changing clothes

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Jets tight end Kellen Winslow has responded to an allegation that the self-proclaimed soldier was performing training exercises in a Target parking lot before he was arrested for possession of synthetic marijuana last November.

According to a report from the East Hanover, N.J. Police Department, police responded to a call from a woman who said she saw Winslow’s erect penis and believed that Winslow was masturbating while sitting in his car. When they arrived, officers found the synthetic marijuana as well as two containers of Vaseline. Winslow’s publicist issued a statement denying Winslow was doing anything other than changing his clothes to mask the smell of the ersatz weed.

“Kellen pulled over to a parking lot to smoke what he thought at the time was a legal substance. He changed his clothes in his vehicle as not to smell like smoke when he returned home.  There was absolutely nothing inappropriate that took place and if there was police would have investigated further and charged Kellen which they did not. This will be the only time we will comment on this unfounded and ridiculous claim.”

The two containers of Vaseline are ignored altogether in the statement, which may be for the best. The Jets, via Dom Cosentino of NJ.com, declined comment on any of it.

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148 Responses to “Kellen Winslow: I was just changing clothes”
  1. trollhammer20 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:34 PM

    So he thought it was legal, but he decided to change clothes so no one could smell this legal substance on him. Right.

  2. acmepackers says: Jan 17, 2014 1:35 PM

    This guy needs to disappear. Play with yourself in private, dude.

  3. bucrightoff says: Jan 17, 2014 1:36 PM

    Easily in the top 10 biggest wastes of talent ever. The guy could have been an elite TE, but instead decided to be an elite loser.

  4. joemontanawasthegreatest says: Jan 17, 2014 1:37 PM

    A very odd man

  5. The League's Crusade Against The Steelers Continues says: Jan 17, 2014 1:37 PM

    Please call him Kellen Winslow Jr.

  6. skinsrock says: Jan 17, 2014 1:38 PM

    This story is pretty believable… I could see how a woman could think a man was doing something wrong while he was just changing his clothes… Easy misunderstanding… Until you get to the two jars of Vaseline.

  7. hanifmiller says: Jan 17, 2014 1:38 PM

    Sorry Kellen, nothing can explain away two containers of vaseline. I was going to give you the benefit of doubt until I read that.

  8. zoellner25 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:39 PM

    Liar, liar, pants on fire

  9. mrplow3 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:39 PM

    “The two containers of Vaseline are ignored altogether in the statement, which may be for the best.”

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    I’m sorry but that’s the only thing I can say about this.

  10. bassplucker says: Jan 17, 2014 1:40 PM

    This story is so many levels of awesome.

    That being said… enough of this clown already. Can we please get him out of the league and make room for some kid who really takes his job seriously?

  11. ps3988 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:42 PM

    Well, he’s never been know as a ball dropper; now we know the secret to his success.

  12. ctiggs says: Jan 17, 2014 1:42 PM

    This is what happens when you get married.

  13. joetoronto says: Jan 17, 2014 1:43 PM

    “Kellen pulled over to a parking lot to smoke what he thought at the time was a legal substance. He changed his clothes in his vehicle as not to smell like smoke when he returned home.”

    Wow, lol. Just shut up already, moron.

  14. jetsjetsjetsnow says: Jan 17, 2014 1:44 PM

    …”at the time thought was a legal substance”? Last time I checked NJ has not legalized marihuana….

    I’ll never be able to look at a Boston. Market roaster the same way again…!

  15. pooflingingmonkey says: Jan 17, 2014 1:44 PM

    One jar of Vaseline would suffice in most cases…

  16. buffalodiehard says: Jan 17, 2014 1:45 PM

    So one jar of Vaseline wasn’t enough?

  17. tlow97 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:45 PM

    It’s the pleats

  18. GenoAtkinswillnotbestopped says: Jan 17, 2014 1:47 PM

    He’s probably gotten lucky 57 times doing the same routine…

  19. schmitty2 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:47 PM

    Not condoning what he did but masturbation/pot sounds like a pretty relaxing time.

  20. fdugrad says: Jan 17, 2014 1:47 PM

    Well, I would HOPE you were changing your clothes! What a perfect example of continually making things MUCH worse by continued talking. There is NOTHING he can say regarding his latest “episode” that can’t be turned into a joke, much like his FORMER career, and apparently the direction of his NEW, after-football-life

  21. cowpiesnotcowboys says: Jan 17, 2014 1:48 PM

    The vaseline was required to squeeze into those tight leather pants he was putting on.

  22. papasbasement says: Jan 17, 2014 1:48 PM

    I used to change my clothes four or five times a day when I was a teenager.

  23. redmanalishi says: Jan 17, 2014 1:49 PM

    Yup. Rex is the right guy to bring class and professionalism back to this team. His players are already responding positively to his new contract.

  24. 6ball says: Jan 17, 2014 1:49 PM

    .

    I would have gone with: “the vasolene was BOGO at Pathmark”

    .

  25. jimmyt says: Jan 17, 2014 1:49 PM

    Synthetic marijuana? You would think he could afford the real stuff.

  26. harrisonhits2 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:49 PM

    Too funny, wonder what his next act will be? Maybe disappearing from the nfl

  27. securb2013 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:50 PM

    Maybe he needed the Vaseline to slide into his skinny jeans.

  28. ratsfoiledagain says: Jan 17, 2014 1:50 PM

    The title of the article keeps me from reading anything further.

    I kinda want to read this, but I fear the content contained within.

  29. cowpiesnotcowboys says: Jan 17, 2014 1:51 PM

    So he thought the smoking was legal, yet went to great lengths to avoid getting caught doing it? Yeah, right.

  30. azarkhan says: Jan 17, 2014 1:51 PM

    And the vaseline was needed because those pants are so tight?

  31. wayneflores says: Jan 17, 2014 1:53 PM

    Well if he stained his clothes, only natural that he would change his clothes. Man got lost after buying Vaseline at Target, perhaps he was using his personal GPS.

  32. GenXJay says: Jan 17, 2014 1:53 PM

    hopefully his account was holiday hacked from buying the Vaseline at Target.

  33. darksidecowboy says: Jan 17, 2014 1:54 PM

    Oh my, this apple has definitely fallen far from the tree. Probably was a spoiled kid with no discipline.

  34. wayneflores says: Jan 17, 2014 1:55 PM

    All that Vaseline on his hands, now explains why he drops the ball so much. QBs may think twice after throwing him the ball.

  35. patriots123456 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:56 PM

    It’s the Jets, what else would you expect?

    I can only imagine Rex’s next tatoo…

  36. logast says: Jan 17, 2014 1:57 PM

    Senior has to be shaking his head.

  37. footballnut85 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:58 PM

    What a waste of talent! Another product of the U!!! They have to be so proud of that football program!

  38. logast says: Jan 17, 2014 1:58 PM

    Also reminds me of There’s Something About Mary. “I was just taking a leak!”

  39. whiteknightblackheart says: Jan 17, 2014 1:58 PM

    I am going to store this information in the same mental folder as that Philly swiss cheese guy and just…let it go. Man, I can’t. Why two jars? Why swiss cheese?? WHY?!?!?

  40. laxer37 says: Jan 17, 2014 1:59 PM

    Even Pee Wee Herman thinks this guy needs help.

  41. rutchaser says: Jan 17, 2014 2:00 PM

    I can’t believe he had the soldier out.

  42. losangelesbillsofbuffalo says: Jan 17, 2014 2:01 PM

    That’s what the “Kony 2012″ director said too.

  43. classicfinder says: Jan 17, 2014 2:02 PM

    So wouldn’t the scent in the car just aroma up his changed clothes?

  44. @HowdyDoobie says: Jan 17, 2014 2:04 PM

    Blame it on the concussion’s.

  45. losingisnotanoption says: Jan 17, 2014 2:06 PM

    Why were there two containers of vaseline?

  46. louisvillebear says: Jan 17, 2014 2:07 PM

    This must have happened before. I finally understand why Brett Favre and his teammates were singing ‘Pants on the Ground’.

  47. superleadhead says: Jan 17, 2014 2:09 PM

    Wow. Just wow.

  48. azjohnny says: Jan 17, 2014 2:09 PM

    Untill recently synthetic marijuana was legal. I am not sure About the NJ law

  49. djcarltonio says: Jan 17, 2014 2:10 PM

    Master of his domain?

  50. ianwetpantscom says: Jan 17, 2014 2:10 PM

    He’s a Solja.

  51. shaggytoodle says: Jan 17, 2014 2:12 PM

    All that Vaseline explains why he slipped off the motorcycle.

  52. jbaxt says: Jan 17, 2014 2:12 PM

    Vaseline… What is this guy 12?

    Millionaire who jerks off in a target parking lot? Sicko!

  53. youhurtmyfeelings says: Jan 17, 2014 2:16 PM

    REDSKINS!!! REDSKINS!!! REDSKINS!!! REDSKINS!!!!

  54. hawkforlife says: Jan 17, 2014 2:23 PM

    2 jars? Really? Someone has an ego.

  55. td30 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:24 PM

    hahaha. he actually thinks people would buy that excuse.

  56. finfanjim says: Jan 17, 2014 2:24 PM

    Yep, I got nothin…

  57. cacheesehead1237 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:28 PM

    So he was getting stoned in his car and then changing his clothes so he could DRIVE HOME STONED so he wouldn’t smell like pot when he got home, BY DRIVING STONED?!?!?!?!?!

    Anyone see a problem with this? He was admitting he was stoned and planned on driving home in that condition. Ummmm, maybe admitting to beating off in parking lot might not be the worst thing.

  58. jtakstaples says: Jan 17, 2014 2:34 PM

    Guys like this who are always in trouble or distractions to the team always get chance after chance to play in the league.

    Can someone explain why Tebow doesn’t get the same chance as these guys? (don’t give me the he can’t throw excuse. Winslow can’t catch or block and he’s still playing)

  59. FinFan68 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:34 PM

    Time for dad to finally tell him that he’s adopted

  60. possumsauce says: Jan 17, 2014 2:34 PM

    LOL, that is PRECISELY the excuse J-Roc used when got caught playing pocket pool on ‘Trailer Park Boys’. No one believed it then, and no one believes it now.

  61. truths4all says: Jan 17, 2014 2:35 PM

    With this news, he has proven he is PERFECT for the new Steelers.

  62. elwaysmilehighdenver says: Jan 17, 2014 2:36 PM

    Kellen please swing by A Rods place and then both of you can disappear for good.

  63. truninerfan49 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:39 PM

    I have never understood whacking off in public. Go somewhere and lock the bathroom door.

  64. joshmac982 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:41 PM

    Two full containers of Vaseline? Good lord! This guy really is a soldier.

  65. Nic says: Jan 17, 2014 2:42 PM

    Look, we’ve all been there. Hit up a target to get 2 jars of vasoline for extremely, extremely chapped lips, work yourself up an appetite and think to yourself “damn, only a Boston Market will satisfy my hunger today. but wait, I am in no way dressed for Boston Market.” Change clothes only to realize that the allure of Boston Market not only appeals to your appetite but your carnal desires, and BOOM. Nosey target-lady shows up and it’s all downhill from there.

    At least I understand you, K2.

  66. spankingthemonkey says: Jan 17, 2014 2:42 PM

    i don’t see too many professional football players doing “training exercises” at my local target parking lot. Two jars of vaseline–Guilty!

  67. dstroi says: Jan 17, 2014 2:50 PM

    Wait, What? Two jars of vaseline? Why? I’m confused. Too many questions to be answered with this one. Then again, this is “THE SOLDIER”!!! wayohhhhhhhh

  68. emmac13 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:52 PM

    What is up with this guy doing stupid stuff in parking lots? In Cleveland he fell of his motorcycle doing stunts. Now illegal synthetic marajuana and vaseline. Seriously dude take some of your cash and buy some land in the sticks.

  69. todd6162 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:53 PM

    He wasn’t the master of his domain!

  70. smcgaels1997 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:55 PM

    That 2nd jar of Vaseline did him in

  71. drsummeroff says: Jan 17, 2014 2:55 PM

    ““Kellen pulled over to a parking lot to smoke what he thought at the time was a legal substance. He changed his clothes in his vehicle as not to smell like smoke when he returned home. There was absolutely nothing inappropriate that took place and if there was police would have investigated further and charged Kellen which they did not. This will be the only time we will comment on this unfounded and ridiculous claim.”

    ————————————————

    Yours Truly, Baghdad Bob.

  72. navis97 says: Jan 17, 2014 2:58 PM

    Maybe the Vaseline was medicinal?

  73. chilomane says: Jan 17, 2014 3:00 PM

    Attention solider!

  74. a3c1e says: Jan 17, 2014 3:02 PM

    He must have had some really tight skinny jeans on….I can’t think of any other reason why he had the costco-sized tub of Vaseline.

  75. 2qswing says: Jan 17, 2014 3:05 PM

    Just changing clothes? hmmm And just how did the lawyer explain the presence of “little Kellen” at attention per the witness? … just askin’

  76. salscobrakai says: Jan 17, 2014 3:06 PM

    Was Pee Wee Herman in the passenger seat?

  77. thejuddstir says: Jan 17, 2014 3:12 PM

    Sounds like Target is getting the shaft inside the store and in their parking lot!

  78. chaseutley says: Jan 17, 2014 3:14 PM

    Just changing clothes? Sounds like he must have been going “commando” that day.

    See what I did there? Wokka wokka!

  79. samphilvista82 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:16 PM

    Just relieving a little stress after being stuck in 4 hours of traffic getting over the GW Bridge – perfectly understandable.

  80. cap2255 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:18 PM

    He don’t use butter. He don’t use cheese. He don’t use jelly, or any of these. He uses Vaseline.

  81. patsfan1820 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:18 PM

    Hahahahahaha this is too damn funny.

  82. @Cereal_22 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:19 PM

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA !! Born rich & famous, played NFL football & this is how he gets off. Just goes to show jerks are jerks & will end up hurt up no matter what.

  83. biggs13 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:20 PM

    The self-claimed “soldier” that has never stepped on a battlefield is a total moron.

  84. Youknowimright says: Jan 17, 2014 3:28 PM

    This is crazy. This is something Alper would do.

  85. filthymcnasty1 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:32 PM

    We all know where Target is HQ’d, but people just can’t do that kind of thing outside of MN.

  86. gammynomnom says: Jan 17, 2014 3:34 PM

    When asked why his hands were slippery, Winslow responded ” Beats me “

  87. ruthlessburgher says: Jan 17, 2014 3:39 PM

    “I had to change my clothes because my pants were obviously on fire” -Kellen “Liar, Liar” Winslow

  88. blackdonnelly says: Jan 17, 2014 3:41 PM

    I suppose one has to “buff the bishop” every so often, but c’mon now, in public? Class outfit they have going on over there…..

  89. jetsjetsjetsnow says: Jan 17, 2014 3:45 PM

    At least Pee Wee Herman did it in a porno theatre… Whats the deal with the mall parking lot angle?

    A novel way to pick up desperate chicks?

  90. briwis7 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:48 PM

    I read Boston Market has announced the Choking the Chicken special. Chicken, Sticky Rice, and Creamed Spinach

  91. kinggator says: Jan 17, 2014 3:49 PM

    Sounds like KWJr was giving the “little soldier” some extra reps in the parking lot – who needs 2 jars of Vaseline – was he planning on playing a triple header while ogling the milfish Target patrons. Side Note- Rex’s next tattoo will be of KWJr fapping in a car as he leers creepily at the tattoo of Sanchez & feet!

  92. clesportsfan says: Jan 17, 2014 3:54 PM

    Was there vaseline found on his hands when he crashed his crotch rocket in Cleveland?

  93. elliottcovert says: Jan 17, 2014 3:56 PM

    Welcome to the Bengals, Kellen!

  94. rukiddingme2014 says: Jan 17, 2014 3:57 PM

    Spanky Winslow…..it has a nice ring to it.

  95. thejuddstir says: Jan 17, 2014 3:59 PM

    Target’s really been having a “hard time” lately!

  96. averagjoe says: Jan 17, 2014 4:08 PM

    According to one witness, “He took it out.”

  97. pflynn20 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:08 PM

    Can you blame him? Target is full of decent trim

  98. napavalleyshaun says: Jan 17, 2014 4:09 PM

    He must have already BEEN to Boston Market because she caught him holding the chicken…

  99. napavalleyshaun says: Jan 17, 2014 4:11 PM

    ‘Not at the table Carlos’

  100. davikes says: Jan 17, 2014 4:14 PM

    He should have said “The prostitute jumped into the back seat just before the woman saw her. Then she ran away.” MUCH better story.

  101. hotep999 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:27 PM

    Met my GF in Target haha

  102. deltaoracle says: Jan 17, 2014 4:37 PM

    The old one gun salute.

  103. papacrick says: Jan 17, 2014 4:40 PM

    Can’t imagine the ribbing his teammates will unleash on him when he arrives at training camp. Would love to be a fly on the wall for those conversations

  104. geefan1 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:41 PM

    Better call Saul.

  105. kitnamania13 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:47 PM

    If only there was a hotel nearby where he could change his clothes. Unfortunately, in East Hanover, the nearest hotel is almost 50 feet away from the Target.

  106. fester73 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:56 PM

    Good lord, what some people do in their spare time will never cease to amaze me, 2 jars, man he must have been ready to party

  107. rajbais says: Jan 17, 2014 4:56 PM

    He (allegedly) does in the area where Michael Strahan got a vaseline endorsement.

    Target apparently has one more thing to worry about after the credit card fiasco its customers experienced.

  108. dukeearl says: Jan 17, 2014 4:56 PM

    Will he be the next football player advertising for “Beats” audio?

  109. jviva77 says: Jan 17, 2014 4:57 PM

    and then there were 2.

  110. weepingjebus says: Jan 17, 2014 5:04 PM

    This got weird in a hurry.

  111. citiciti says: Jan 17, 2014 5:06 PM

    Daddy is so proud.

  112. jvw1982 says: Jan 17, 2014 5:47 PM

    Sometimes its best to just say no comment or better yet say you can’t talk about it because of the pending charge……remember if you can’t tell the truth don’t say anything….

  113. str8cashomie2 says: Jan 17, 2014 6:13 PM

    Smokin that Katie will do it to u

  114. mysticbrownie says: Jan 17, 2014 6:19 PM

    Well…….atleast we know now what happened in Cleveland with the Motorcycle…one handed operation with slick palms = Torn ACL

  115. rjth2012 says: Jan 17, 2014 6:19 PM

    Soon to be endorsed players favorite phrases
    Peyton audible: OMAHA OMAHA

    Winslow : Alias for 2014 season> KY2

    Announcers doing Jets games next season; “Winslow (KY2) has 2 dropped balls and he was all by himself”
    “KY2 got caught with his pants down on that play”
    “KY2 has a great feel for balls in his area”
    KY2 has really soft hands but the balls keep slipping through”

  116. phinfan says: Jan 17, 2014 6:20 PM

    He don’t use butter
    He don’t use cheese
    He don’t use jelly
    Or any of these
    HE uses VAAaaasssseeeelliiiinnneeee

  117. lowleadman says: Jan 17, 2014 6:27 PM

    I like the fact that he’s in a Jets uniform. Maybe Ryan has a tat of him somewhere.

  118. calicokiller49 says: Jan 17, 2014 6:46 PM

    Whatever sparky.

  119. sfraider says: Jan 17, 2014 6:49 PM

    Manti Te’o had a long distance relationship with two containers of Vaseline.

  120. voyager6 says: Jan 17, 2014 7:15 PM

    He was changing from cotton to hemp.

  121. lbcoach34 says: Jan 17, 2014 7:23 PM

    2 containers….

  122. bert1913 says: Jan 17, 2014 7:34 PM

    i hope kellen wasn’t taking advice from ray lewis

  123. jlilly67 says: Jan 17, 2014 7:42 PM

    I can only picture Jon Lovitz as the Liar….”I was only acting”……..”yeah, I needed the Vaseline for….for a car I’m building”

  124. sdchicken says: Jan 17, 2014 7:47 PM

    Oh, ok. I get it now. Who hasn’t driven to Target to go change clothes in your car, in the parking lot with a couple bottles of Vaseline?

  125. thetooloftools says: Jan 17, 2014 7:59 PM

    This does explain a lot though.

  126. briang123 says: Jan 17, 2014 8:05 PM

    More embarrassing but in the end cheaper than what Arian Foster is dealing with.

  127. upperdecker19 says: Jan 17, 2014 8:27 PM

    So Kellen…..who’s your favorite “Little Rascal”???? Alfalfa? Or Spanky?

  128. dualprime says: Jan 17, 2014 8:29 PM

    Omaha!

  129. onbucky96 says: Jan 17, 2014 8:49 PM

    Sinner.

  130. wolfman55h says: Jan 17, 2014 9:08 PM

    Is this the same idiot who few years ago said he was ‘a soldier!’? Then he was just polishing ‘his bayonet’

  131. katejake says: Jan 17, 2014 9:31 PM

    With only the championship games and Super Bowl left the stories on here are only going to get worse.

  132. danmarinos1stlovechild says: Jan 17, 2014 9:41 PM

    Why was his window down so people who are passing by can easily see him touching himself!?! Sounds to me like hte dude wanted to be seen!
    I guess sometimes we can’t help but fall victim to our carnal urges, no matter how unusual thay can be! lol
    But seriously this guy needs help, a lot of help!

  133. nouhoh64 says: Jan 17, 2014 10:14 PM

    someone sensitive mucho?

  134. murraysons says: Jan 17, 2014 10:20 PM

    Either she was really close to his car, or he has a Dirk Diggler thing going on

  135. albion223 says: Jan 17, 2014 10:29 PM

    I thought he said he was looking for a Boston Market?? If he stuck with that story he could have followed up by saying “since I got lost I pulled over and choked my own chicken”

  136. emaney477 says: Jan 17, 2014 10:38 PM

    2 jars?!?!?!?!?!? That’s alotta lovin of oneself!

  137. jviva77 says: Jan 18, 2014 12:06 AM

    He took it out? He took it, out.

  138. pftfollower says: Jan 18, 2014 12:06 AM

    Why 2 jars? Clearly a backup. I mean what if he had to miss a chance to punch the clown waiting on drive through?

  139. granadafan says: Jan 18, 2014 2:50 AM

    Did he hire Terrell Owens’ publicist to come up with this flimsy excuse?

  140. oldcracker says: Jan 18, 2014 2:51 AM

    I anxiously await to see what SNL does with this!

  141. nyneal says: Jan 18, 2014 3:56 AM

    Yeah, right. He was just changing his clothes, not spanking his monkey.
    And Pee Wee Herman was just trying to make some butter for his popcorn.
    And George Michael was just trying to use a friend’s petey as a tooth pick.
    And Bill Clinton “did not have sex with that woman”.
    And Alex Rodriguez, Barry Bonds, Ryan Braun, and Rodger Clemens, etc… never used steroids.
    And Michael Jackson wasn’t a wierdo pervert.
    And Richard Nixon wasn’t a crook.
    Need I say more? The only time these weren’t lying was when their mouths were closed.

  142. bills1oftheseyrs says: Jan 18, 2014 5:45 AM

    He was just greasing the skids for the rest of his career

  143. pglht says: Jan 18, 2014 1:35 PM

    Every guy has done it at some point in his life so I don’t see why he needs to feel embarrassed if he did do it. I would argue that she should have minded her own business instead of approaching his car and I would argue if it’s indecent to have himself exposed like that while minding his own business in public then women shouldn’t be allowed to breast-feed or breast-pump in public,

  144. auscon4 says: Jan 18, 2014 4:12 PM

    Ah… There’s the “rub”… As a previous poster commented, you can extract much wisdom from a cinematic masterpiece such as “Something About Mary”. The simple explanation was that KY2 was simply letting off a bit steam… He just had a bit too much “baby batter on the brain”. And that poor woman was just in the wrong place at the wrong time as KY2 was trying to “expose” his sensitive side.

  145. smillr58 says: Jan 18, 2014 6:41 PM

    Lawyers…

  146. thelastpieceofcheese says: Jan 19, 2014 2:22 PM

    Typical criminal element the jests attract.

  147. jacksprat57 says: Jan 20, 2014 12:06 AM

    (Nothing to see here! Move along, people.) Okay, just what is this fascination which Jets players have with their dinguses, anyway? Sure, Giants fans have long maintained that the J-E-T-S are jag-offs, but even they surely thought that to be mere hyperbole. Apparently not.

  148. jacksprat57 says: Jan 20, 2014 12:15 AM

    It’s not like a pro athlete to so badly miss a sponsorship opportunity. Vaseline?! SMH It would’ve been such a good tag-line for the ad campaign: “KY2 here, for KY Jelly. For that special moment, come prepared. Buy TWO jars, for all of your Tight Ends. Can you help a brother out?” ROTFLMFAO

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