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Saturday morning one-liners

Rocky

When Patriots QB Tom Brady races someone on the beach, it doesn’t look like Rocky Balboa vs. Apollo Creed.

The Jets have hired Ian Lasher, a former ESPN employee, to serve as Senior V.P. of Corporate Sponsorships.

Now that former Bills WR Andre Reed has made it to the Hall of Fame, he sent some of his stuff there for display.

Long-time Dolphins P.R. chief Harvey Greene has become the team’s V.P. of historical affairs; Jason Jenkins becomes the team’s new V.P. of communications.

Could the Ravens make an uncharacteristic splash in free agency?

The Browns have fired player engagement director Aaron Shea, a former tight end with the team.  (They’ll fire his successor in a year or so.)

Former Steelers WR Antwaan Randle El is coach, mentor, and athletics director at Virginia Academy, a private school in the D.C. area.

Bengals free-agents could be making a beeline to Minnesota, for a reunion with Mike Zimmer.

The suggestion that the Jaguars would sign QB Mike Vick didn’t make much sense before they re-signed Chad Henne; it makes even less sense now.

Now with the Colts, former Cleveland coach Rob Chudzinski had a major role in recruiting LB D’Qwell Jackson to Indy.

With no contractual trigger forcing the team’s hand before Week One, the Titans will continue to bide their time with RB Chris Johnson, presumably hoping for a trade offer.

Texans LT Duane Brown hosted a pep rally at a local elementary school that raised more than 30,000 pounds of food for local hunger-relief charities.

Vegas doesn’t have a lot of faith in the Chiefs for 2014.

With 17 unrestricted free agents and $66 million in cap space, the Raiders can go in a lot of different directions.  (Fans are hoping one of them is “up”.)

Broncos G Zane Beadles wants to stay in Denver, but the impending free agent hasn’t worked out a deal yet.

Soon-to-be-free-agent WR James Jones has interest in the Chargers.

Former Redskins QB Colt Brennan hasn’t been cleared to play for the L.A. Kiss of the Arena Football League, due to a traumatic brain injury suffered in a 2010 car accident.

Coach Tom Coughlin gave a pep talk to a lacrosse team that borrowed the Giants’ practice facility this week.

Cowboys coach Jason Garrett and QB Tony Romo played a game of “PIG” at Cameron Indoor Stadium on Friday night.  (Garrett may have opted to call it “WAD“.)

Eagles G.M. Howie Roseman believes that, with more teams having money to spend than last year but less talent available, the early days of free agency will see more aggressive moves than last year.

The Lions have tendered KR Jeremy Ross, an exclusive-rights free agent (i.e., not a free agent) who became the first member of the franchise to return a kick and a punt for a touchdown in the same game since 1977.

It’s one thing to want to add 5,000 seats to Soldier Field, the Bears’ home stadium; it’s another to figure out where to put them.

A Vikings fan who wore a purple and yellow sombrero to a 2012 game at Lambeau Field was acquitted of battery charges but convicted of disorderly conduct.

The Packers want C Evan Dietrich-Smith back, but time is running out for them to retain the soon-to-be free agent.

At a time when the Panthers are focused on keeping their own, here are 10 free agents who could help improve the team.

Key Saints executives had very nice things to say about WR Lance Moore on the day he was cut loose.

The Buccaneers have re-signed LB Jonathan Casillas, who started four games last season.

The grandmother of Falcons coach Mike Smith recently celebrated her 100th birthday.

The Rams hold a fifth-year option on DE Robert Quinn; given his performance in 2014, he may want to get a new contract before 2016.

The 49ers have installed the first collapsible goal posts in the NFL, an idea possibly inspired by the sideline histrionics of coach Jim Harbaugh.

Cardinals G.M. Steve Keim says the team’s experience in 2013 proves that “there’s no reason to rush and go out and overspend.”

The Seahawks’ 12th man jersey currently ranks 10th in all jersey sales.

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14 Responses to “Saturday morning one-liners”
  1. jeffnfl says: Mar 8, 2014 11:17 AM

    Any fans of any other teams think the Seahawks 12th man jersey is kind of ridiculous?

    Maybe an older tradition when they didn’t have any players whose jersey you’d want? Just think it’s kind of weird.

  2. thepftpoet says: Mar 8, 2014 11:26 AM

    Vikings fans unite.

    As we are the chosen ones!

    We decide the fate of the NFL.

    As we obtain greatness that is above the fans of all other teams.

    Jealousy awaits us, as it should.

    Our franchise will dominate the NFL for the next five decades.

    The Vikings Dynasty Begins….

    Now.

  3. thevikesarebest says: Mar 8, 2014 11:28 AM

    The Vikes Are Best.SKOL

  4. themackstrong says: Mar 8, 2014 11:46 AM

    Fans that think its weird for Seattle’s “12″ to being a top 10 don’t understand there is a deep connection between the Seahawks and the “12th Man”.

    For years the Seahawks have included the fans in traditions and tried to incorporate them into the game. The players, coaches, owners and even the media acknowledge the passion of the fans because its special. I am not trying to say this kind of thing is exclusive to Seattle because all fans have it with their clubs but ask Denver fans at the Super Bowl what they thought of the “12′s”. What is wrong with taking pride in that??

  5. diegiantsdie says: Mar 8, 2014 11:56 AM

    If my team came up with the 12th man jersey I would on one. It would never leave in free agency, get cut, fired, or arrested for rape

  6. kev86 says: Mar 8, 2014 12:05 PM

    There is no tomorrow

  7. outlawshark says: Mar 8, 2014 12:12 PM

    The “Fan” jersey is actually a double-edged sword. Yes, they are selling a lot of them, and the beauty of it is that as players come and go, fans don’t have to get a new jersey when their player leaves for another team. Consequently, future jersey sales for specific players will decrease due to the collective.

  8. joetoronto says: Mar 8, 2014 12:13 PM

    “Vegas doesn’t have a lot of faith in the Chiefs for 2014.”

    Everyone knows what’s in store for the Chiefs this year, everyone.

  9. GenXJay says: Mar 8, 2014 12:22 PM

    Mark Swanson proved that gb fans run their mouth & cannot back it up.
    Unfortunate for the father of cheesedick son though.

  10. andrewluck12 says: Mar 8, 2014 2:26 PM

    if seahawk fans were so great how come that jersey hasn’t always been selling so much. they act like their fan base is so special. ”we are the loudest” bull. your stadium is designed to retain all that noise. 12th man is universally used so stop acting like your something special. congrats on winning the super bowl, get ready for next year

  11. shakespeare22 says: Mar 8, 2014 2:31 PM

    Are the Vikings still in the NFL?

  12. beardinals says: Mar 8, 2014 2:49 PM

    Funny part is when overzealous Vikings fans actually sway people into NOT liking the team because of their antics.

  13. seaeagle707 says: Mar 8, 2014 5:41 PM

    Serious question, Mike. What the heck does a “player engagement director” do? Get ‘em autograph sessions at the local shopping mall?

  14. stunzeed5 says: Mar 8, 2014 5:52 PM

    Didn’t know Colt Brennan still existed after he embarrassed himself in the NFL, UFL, CFL and now AFL? Has that ever happened before, getting cut/released in FOUR leagues? Unreal……lol

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