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Calvin Johnson gets caught in middle of a mess, reportedly

Calvin AP

Lions receiver Calvin Johnson has never gotten in trouble.  He recently got himself in the middle of some potential trouble, reportedly.

According to TMZ, the alleged mother of Johnson’s six-month-old child contends that Johnson’s girlfriend threatened to unfurl the maneuver known as the “molly wop.”

For those not familiar with the term and/or those without access to UrbanDictionary.com, to “molly wop” means “[t]o reach waaay back with your pimp hand, damn near knocking oneself off balance to deliver a massive blow with an inside closed fist to the temple of your hoe or foe.”  (In the interests of completeness, there are alternative definitions, but they would be difficult for a female to perform.)

Citing a police report, TMZ explains that Shallyn Blanton claims Johnson arrived for a visit with the child on May 25.  Johnson brought his girlfriend, Brittney McNorton.  Blanton alleges that McNorton’s presence violated the custody agreement.  One thing led to another (as things often do), and McNorton eventually (allegedly) “leapt from the car screaming that she was going to ‘molly wop yo ass!”

According to the team’s official website, McNorton serves as the team’s Manager of Partner Activation.  Whatever the position was previously known as informally within the building, there’s a good chance that, from this point forward, it will be known as the “molly wop” job.

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40 Responses to “Calvin Johnson gets caught in middle of a mess, reportedly”
  1. Joe Schmoe says: May 29, 2014 9:09 AM

    I don’t know which hand is my pimp hand. Why didn’t they teach me this in high school?

  2. chrisswitzer2189 says: May 29, 2014 9:11 AM

    This is awesome!

  3. vikefan284296 says: May 29, 2014 9:13 AM

    This is hilarious lol

  4. m3dman3 says: May 29, 2014 9:16 AM

    These things never happen in Detroit, I’m shocked!

  5. erictheclown says: May 29, 2014 9:17 AM

    KLASSY!!!

  6. upperdecker19 says: May 29, 2014 9:21 AM

    Any article needing urbandictionary clarification is Pulitzer worthy in my book.

  7. opinevain says: May 29, 2014 9:21 AM

    Oh this happens all the time with regular guys not only athletes lol

  8. nomoreliesfortoday says: May 29, 2014 9:26 AM

    I was only familiar with definition # 5 on Urban Dictionary.

    Thank goodness their is another definition for Calvin Johnson’s sake.

  9. cowboysnation34 says: May 29, 2014 9:29 AM

    Why does it sound like a dance move?

  10. ispysomething7 says: May 29, 2014 9:32 AM

    The D!

  11. livenbreathefootball says: May 29, 2014 9:35 AM

    Why do men bring their new girlfriends to the old girlfriend’s house. It never ends well.

    And classy chick you got working in the front office there Lions if she uses language like that.

  12. fleaman1381 says: May 29, 2014 9:36 AM

    And today I learned about “molly wop”…

  13. clssylssy says: May 29, 2014 9:36 AM

    ROFL! Great stuff, and Roger Goodell’s probably thinking that this sort of impromtu comedy relief would be a good draw for awarding Detroit a Superbowl! Maybe they can sell official NFL “urban dictionarys” to help with the language barrier.

  14. cowboys2014 says: May 29, 2014 9:38 AM

    Guess we will report on anything these days.

  15. Steeley McBeam says: May 29, 2014 9:38 AM

    I love this website.

  16. docsweeney says: May 29, 2014 9:42 AM

    The quote “[t]o reach waaay back with your pimp hand, damn near knocking oneself off balance to deliver a massive blow with an inside closed fist to the temple of your hoe or foe” is really funny if you imagine it being read by Peter O’Toole or John Houseman.

  17. trumb1mj says: May 29, 2014 9:46 AM

    “These things never happen in Detroit, I’m shocked!”

    By Detroit do you mean Georgia? Because that’s where it happened.

  18. thetruthcampaign says: May 29, 2014 9:49 AM

    Why is CJ with anyone who would know what molly wop means?

  19. tformation says: May 29, 2014 10:02 AM

    This offseason seems long.

  20. bigbens69taintedlove says: May 29, 2014 10:07 AM

    WORLDSTAR!!!!

  21. elliottcovert says: May 29, 2014 10:10 AM

    Molly Wop sounds like a pokemon.

    I know Megatron is rich, but I had no idea he could afford pokemon!

  22. justintuckrule says: May 29, 2014 10:14 AM

    Nothing beats baby mamma drama.

  23. mfinsrule says: May 29, 2014 10:23 AM

    Who knew I could gain cool points with the kids reading PFT!? Street Cred for using this term!

  24. kilo0986 says: May 29, 2014 10:26 AM

    Bwahaha. Nice!

  25. kamthechancellor says: May 29, 2014 10:49 AM

    No need for urban dictionary. Just watch SuperBowl 48 for the true definition of “molly wop.”

  26. nflcommissioner says: May 29, 2014 10:49 AM

    I wish someone would Molly Wop Jerry Jones.

  27. vikingferd says: May 29, 2014 10:54 AM

    Are you sure Vince McMahon wasn’t in the bushes with his “hidden camera” filming this?

  28. davikes says: May 29, 2014 11:08 AM

    The new girlfriend probably wanted to see CJ and his son together to figure out what kind of father he would be.

  29. wisconsinhillfolk says: May 29, 2014 11:22 AM

    Johnson has in no way been implicated in the commission of any crime or threat. To suggest otherwise is… typical.

  30. larryboodry says: May 29, 2014 11:26 AM

    This is freakin’ hilarious. But kinda stupid on Calvin’s part to bring the new GF with to visit his kid’s mom.

  31. dukeearl says: May 29, 2014 11:30 AM

    Johnson may not have been implicated… need to question the lack of common sense.

  32. jorgeb420 says: May 29, 2014 11:35 AM

    LMAO!!!!! Oh man this is too funny!!!! God bless the urban dictionary. Instead of a molly wop she shoulda gave her a French microphone. LOL look it up!

  33. barneyrumble says: May 29, 2014 12:19 PM

    I’m curious if there was an “OH NO you Didn’t” anywhere in the altercation.

  34. gotdressedinabooth says: May 29, 2014 12:56 PM

    Your pimp hand will be the strong one. Always.

  35. mazblast says: May 29, 2014 12:58 PM

    Any resemblance between what was said in this confrontation and American English is strictly coincidental.

    Come on, Megatron. I’d expect this kind of mess if it involved someone playing for Dallas, Oakland, or Cincinnati, but you…?

  36. mackcarrington says: May 29, 2014 1:46 PM

    Why would you bring your girlfriend to your baby momma’s house?

  37. kferguson2002 says: May 29, 2014 2:02 PM

    It’s so cold in the D.

  38. doe22us says: May 29, 2014 3:03 PM

    Manager of Partner Activation, the jokes just write themselves, but anyhow molly wop lol, and besides Calvin is a darn fool for taking his chick to the baby mama’s crib what a dolt.

  39. craigkintexas says: May 29, 2014 4:19 PM

    Can’t make this stuff up! Molly Wop???? Really??? And we wonder why America ranks so low against other developed countries in so many areas….pitiful.

  40. cavington says: May 31, 2014 12:44 AM

    You can take the man out of the ghetto. You can’t take the ghetto out of the man.

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