Thursday morning one-liners

AP

New Bills defensive coordinator Jim Schwartz is fired up to get on the field.

Dolphins rookie Billy Turner’s the subject of an online documentary film.

In a wise move, the Patriots want to protect QB Tom Brady better.

Turnover and injuries have made the Jets secondary a question mark.

Ravens S Matt Elam is showing signs of growth.

A look at how the Colin Kaepernick contract affects Bengals QB Andy Dalton (I think the answer is Elmo singing “One of these things is not like the other”).

A bunch of elementary school students are copying Browns QB Johnny Manziel’s “money” gesture (which is all fun and games until the NCAA cracks down on them, … oh, wait).

Steelers WR Antonio Brown has become a leader of a young group.

Texans DE J.J. Watt didn’t actually need any work done on his famous nose.

The Colts added a pair of rookies to the roster.

The Jaguars are fortunate that all the competitions for jobs are still friendly at this point.

The Titans signed CB Marc Anthony (and I’m trying to think of a J-Lo/Cleopatra joke).

The Broncos ACL crew is making good progress.

The Chiefs are confident young players will sept into the many vacancies on offense.

The Raiders are facing another cheerleader lawsuit.

Chargers rookie CB Jason Verrett is doing what he can while rehabbing from shoulder surgery.

It’s never too early for a little speculation about Cowboys coach Jason Garrett’s future.

There’s still a sense of optimism that Giants RB David Wilson will be cleared for training camp.

Eagles OL Allen Barbre would welcome a starting job.

Redskins WR DeSean Jackson is nursing a hamstring strain.

The Bears practice scuffles are a sign of competition (because they’re surely not signs of contact in non-contact practices).

Lions RB Mikel Leshoure hopes a new staff means a new opportunity.

The Packers have some stability at backup QB for a change.

Vikings teammates are having some fun with hero/LB Chad Greenway.

Falcons WR Julio Jones was doing some light running and cutting with trainers.

The Panthers’ limited offseason action was tied to their need to give QB Cam Newton a contract eventually.

Never mind a gold jacket, Buccaneers legend Derrick Brooks is getting his own bobblehead.

Cardinals rookie QB Logan Thomas is making progress.

Rams QB Garrett Gilbert is embracing his opportunity to win a backup job.

49ers QB Colin Kaepernick’s new contract will only increase the expectations.

The Seahawks want DE Bruce Irvin to have a bigger role this season.