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Cookie caper nearly derailed O.J. Simpson parole, supposedly

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With Hall of Fame running back O.J. Simpson closing in on a shot at getting out of prison in Nevada after serving nine years for a memorabilia heist so goofy it would have been summarily rejected as a Sopranos plot line, an even goofier fact could have kept Simpson from getting out. Supposedly.

According to Josh Peter of USA Today, a retired prison guard claims that an overly zealous colleague rescinded a citation that could have, according to the guard, made it harder for Simpson to get out of prison.

Jeffrey Felix, who previously wrote a book about his experiences with Simpson as an inmate (which instantly should make anyone suspicious of his effort to inject himself into the story), claims that his colleague was going to write Simpson up for eating a cookie that another inmate had taken from the kitchen. The guard considered the cookie contraband, and prepared the documentation.

Felix claims he talked the guard out of going through with it, telling her that she’d be known as the “Cookie Monster” among the prisoners. So she did. Which presumably will help Simpson get out later this year, following his Thursday parole hearing.

Unless, of course, an overly zealous member of the parole board decides to ask Simpson about having contraband in his cell based on Felix’s public comments — and if enough of the members of the parole board don’t mind being known as Cookie Monsters for keeping in prison a guy who ate a forbidden cookie. And, you know, killed a couple of people.

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8 Responses to “Cookie caper nearly derailed O.J. Simpson parole, supposedly”
  1. mackcarrington says: Jul 17, 2017 7:58 PM

    Because there’s never been any biased or corrupt prison guards.

  2. harrisonhits2 says: Jul 17, 2017 9:07 PM

    Call in the National Guard he ate a cookie

  3. briang123 says: Jul 17, 2017 9:15 PM

    OJ mocked the world after he was acquitted. That ridiculous, disproportionate sentence was his karma.

  4. fafaflunky says: Jul 17, 2017 10:07 PM

    Andy dufresne kept his chess pieces. Serious contraband folks

  5. philliephaninva says: Jul 18, 2017 12:48 AM

    Dude looks like he could afford to put down a few cookies.

  6. stc1993 says: Jul 18, 2017 6:55 AM

    His sorry butt needs to stay in prison for the rest of his life.

  7. Ferdinand says: Jul 18, 2017 7:00 PM

    I seem to remember he had a few other violations early on.

  8. wny49er says: Jul 18, 2017 10:07 PM

    Seeing that he got away w double murder, I think another five years for eating a cookie is in order.

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