Tuskers finish perfect season

Somehow, the Florida Tuskers managed to stay focused despite a crush of media hype and scrutiny.

They have completed the first perfect season in the UFL’s long and storied, um, one-year history.

The final win came Thursday night against the California Redwoods (whose uniforms continue to be neither red nor made of wood), by the score of 34-27.

The game included two successful onside kicks in the first eight minutes from the Tuskers, the second of which likely prompted Bill Belichick to observe, “Man, that’s a ballsy move.”

The Tuskers knotted the game at 27 on the first play of the fourth quarter, and they scored the decisive touchdown with six minutes to play.  The Redwoods thereafter were unable to mount a serious threat to force overtime.

And so the Redwoods, led by former Vikings and Cardinals coach Dennis Green, finished the season at 2-4, with narrow losses to the two UFL finalists only five days apart.

“I think it was the third time this year we had a lead at halftime and couldn’t score the sufficient number of points in the second half,” Green said after the game, which is a more resigned way of saying, “The Tusker are who we thought they were and we let ’em off the hook.”

For Florida coach Jim Haslett, the move to 6-0 might not put him in Mercury Morris’ neighborhood, but it could put him under Ralph Wilson’s microscope.  The former Buffalo Pro Bowler opted to take a step back to the UFL in the hopes of taking a step forward, and if Haslett and the Tuskers can take down the Locos next Friday for the UFL title, Haslett might get something more than a courtesy interview.

But first the Tuskers will have to survive the distractions and the demands of UFL championship week, when the UFL-watching world descends on Sin City for a week of gambling, drinking, gambling, turkey, gambling, and (if they wake up before noon the day after Thanksgiving) a little football.

35 responses to “Tuskers finish perfect season

  1. Real history in the making… emphasis on “History.”
    The UFL will fold after a few years, and who would hire Jim Haslett when Mike Holmgrem, Shanahan, Bill Cowher, and a mannequin are available?

  2. I actually went to a UFL game here at UConn, and it was pretty entertaining. I do hope the league survives. If/when the put a team in Conn, I would definitely buy season tickets for a decent price.
    By the way, greatest thing ever to be put on a stadium screen: Tuskers? I BARELY KNEW HER!

  3. “I think it was the third time this year we had a lead at halftime and couldn’t score the sufficient number of points in the second half,” Green said after the game
    ———————————-
    Man, Dennis Green is still retarded. How about, instead of trying to score more points than you expect them to score…..you try and KEEP them from scoring as many points as you have?

  4. ok since we’re considering this “pro football” and we’re talking about it, i expect some eskimos- stampeders and alouettes-lions one liners after their CFL playoff games on sunday.

  5. Darn it! I forgot to watch. I was looking at that game being played by the other league.
    Thank God, I didn’t miss the title game.

  6. Must be something in the water down there in Florida. Is Mercury Morris gonna be a dick to them too?

  7. They have completed the first perfect season in the UFL’s long and storied, um, one-year history.
    The chances of somebody at ESPN asking if this was the “greatest season ever” are very high.

  8. Jim Haslett should be considered for another NFL head coaching job. Look at all the coordinators who have failed over the past few years, and then look at how competitive Haslett’s New Orleans teams were despite Aaron Brooks at QB.

  9. I watched one of those games and felt bad for everybody! Who would waste their money on UFL jerseys, like many had in the stands. Get a life.

  10. mvlonergan:
    “Jim Haslett should be considered for another NFL head coaching job. Look at all the coordinators who have failed over the past few years, and then look at how competitive Haslett’s New Orleans teams were despite Aaron Brooks at QB.”
    That is true, but you also have to consider that Haslett is also the guy who decided to keep Aaron Brooks (78.5 career passer rating) and let Jake Delhomme (83.1 career passer rating) go. Actually, Haslett is a pretty good coach, just make sure he hires, or is forced to hire, a good offensive coordinator. He also needs a strong GM with some savvy in regards to personnel and talent evaluation.

  11. Would of loved to watch some of these games on TV however there was no coverage in my area or my provider sadly.
    I’m sure you will be seeing quite a few of these guys in the NFL next year if you notice them or not. The UFL is a great idea, and has potential to work very nicely as a farm system for the NFL

  12. Between the Fins-Carolina game being so bad and the pain of listening to Matt Millen’s drivel I rather quickly switched to the UFL game and was surprised at how entertaining it was.

  13. Given Haslett will win a championship next week with the Tuskers and Trestman will win a championship next week with the Alouettes, and given Ralph is too cheap to hire anyone who has enjoyed success, I think the Buffalo job is the mannequin’s to lose.

  14. Haslett will make a great Defensive coordinator for Shanahan in Buffalo. Come on Mr. Burns-Wilson spend that cash……

  15. I watched some of this last night (hey, it’s that or the NBA!) and toward the end of the second half, the network had some mikes open and you could clearly hear someone who sounded a lot like Dennis Green yelling, twice, at someone to “tell them to STFU over there.”
    Makes Marino’s little tounge-twister last week seem insignificant.

  16. Brownsfan19:
    How can you say anything about any team. I’d take the Tuskers and lay the Browns 7 points and bet everything I have on it

  17. I think the Tuskers are who we thought they were. And that the Redwoods let them off the hook. So if you want to crown their a$$es, go ahead and crown ’em.

  18. IF there are a list of rules for the team that Haslett laid out at the beginning of the season, I pray they’re called “Tusker Do’s, and Tusker Don’ts.

  19. 25 responses is pretty impressive, perhaps there is a bit of steam building for the UFL. Also, what else are you really going to do the friday after thanksgiving, go shopping with the wife? get outta here, you sit down and be thankful that there is football to watch on TV. If it comes down to shopping with her, I’ve got NO qualms at all about pointing out that its the championship game and I’ve followed them all season. If you folks aren’t seeing the benefit of the UFL yet, you don’t know what you’re missing. Now go buy some title sports drink, a suit at the mens warehouse, and tickets at stubhub…

  20. who brodcasts the UFL?
    it has to be more entertaining than thursday night football, those dudes are the most boring people alive. They need to get a coked up ex pro in there.
    I’d like to see a UFL VS NFL exibition game, that would be intersting.

  21. The UFLis as strong as the NFL, , people love this game and gear is sold out. Las Vegas wins the UFL bowl in Las Vegas.

  22. Have you happened to look at the Thanksgiving Day Football schedule…I’d bet that the UFL Championship Game will be more exciting than those snoozefests.

  23. I live next to AT&T park and figured I’d head over to watch the ?last? game of the UFL I might have a chance of seeing.
    It was just me and 1,000 of my closest friends there watching it. I posted a YouTube about it. The announcer was the best part of the game.


  24. Let’s see.
    3 NFL games Thursday
    UFL final Friday
    College rivalry games Saturday
    NFL Sunday afternoon
    Grey Cup Sunday night.
    When did I die and how much is a pint of Bud up here in heaven?

  25. 6-0? Does that include the playoffs? (skimmed over most of it) Six games were played in what? Three weeks? Is is softball or football?
    You are what we thought you were. Shit!

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Not a member? Register now!