Monday afternoon one-liners

Bills DE Chris Kelsay on his team’s reaction to Chan Gailey’s hiring: “We’re very impressed, very excited.”

With Mike Nolan in Miami, LB Elvis Dumervil could be on the Dolphins’ radar. (Good luck with that.)

SI’s Peter King thinks Patriots coach Pepper Johnson will not be a happy man if he doesn’t get the defensive coordinator gig.

Ravens RB Jalen Parmele expects to compete for kick returns next season.

Bengals special teams coach Darrin Simmons loves his young group of players.

Tony Grossi of the Cleveland Plain-Dealer wouldn’t be surprised if the Browns trade Shaun Rogers.

Steelers S Ryan Clark may be able to get more money if he leaves Pittsburgh as a free agent.

The Jaguars face the fifth-toughest schedule in the league next season on paper.

Texans LB Zac Diles had more tackles for loss in the regular season than his big name teammates. 

The game-winning touchdown catch by Titans WR Kenny Britt against Arizona is a nominee for the NFL’s can’t miss play of the year.

Nate Burleson “hears” about the possibility of Broncos WR Brandon Marshall going to Seattle, but we suspect he’s passing around internet conjecture.  Can’t trust stuff like that.

Chiefs G.M. Scott Pioli talked about his recent coaching hires, and his love of Blue Oyster Cult in a recent a radio appearance.

The saga of WR Javon Walker and the rest of the Raiders receivers is a great lens to examine the dysfunction in Oakland, says Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle.

Chargers fans: Here’s your chance to meet the real “Boltman.”

One week later, Cowboys LB Keith Brooking is still getting killed in the media.  He was put on a list of the all-time biggest whiners . . . by a Philadelphia reporter.

The Giants have high hopes for T William Beatty, but he needs to get stronger.

The recent stir about steroid allegations regarding Michael Vick isn’t getting much attention in Philadelphia.

New Redskins offensive assistant Sean McVay is so young, he played college football at Miami of Ohio, but got there after Ben Roethlisberger left.

Bears WR Devin Aromoshodu can be a “starter and a big-time guy” in the league, according to Reggie Wayne.

The Lions are now the only NFC team to never make a Super Bowl.

The headline in Green Bay: “Oops, same old Brett.”  The first line of the article by the great Bob McGinn: “Joy reigns in Packerland. Brett Favre has struck out.”

The Falcons have to make a decision about “nasty boy” G Harvey Dahl.

Only Philip Rivers had a higher passer rating than Panthers QB Matt Moore in the final five weeks of the season.

How bad were the Bucs last year?  Despite all the Pro Bowl replacements, no one from Tampa Bay has been called yet.

The mock drafts have started and the Arizona Republic thinks the Cardinals need a tackle like Oklahoma’s Trent Williams.

Pete Carroll was described as a “little boy that looks like he needs to go to the bathroom” in an entertaining conversation with KJR950 in Seattle.

Rams G.M. Billy Devaney on upgrading his talent base: “We need playmakers. That’s what we have to get on our team right now,
that’s what we have to get: guys that can score touchdowns from way
out, guys that can sack the quarterback, make a difference, impact a

The 49ers could look for a change-of-pace back after a disappointing rookie year from Glen Coffee.

5 responses to “Monday afternoon one-liners

  1. With Mike Nolan in Miami, LB Elvis Dumervil could be on the Dolphins’ radar. (Good luck with that.)
    Dumervil doesn’t fit the Parcells size profile when it comes to the OLB position…

  2. Surely if Brooking is on that list, he must be way down on that list behind the whiniest fans in the NFL: the shEagles and the Viqueens. I have come up with a solution that will make it a certainty that one of these two teams will win a trophy every year and that is bring back the runner-up bowl that was played back in the sixties. Design a trophy that instead of having a football on top, they put a big Vagina on top and they could call it the “Choker” which exemplifies these two franchises. They should require that the tickets should be distributed strictly on a fifty/fifty basis so you would hear nothing but constant whining even if one team should score. At the end of the game, they could set up a ticker tape trophy presentation at the center of the field and have the world’s biggest douche Terry Bradshaw present it to the winner and that way, surely one of these teams could win a trophy……face it it’s the only way it’s ever going to happen, provided these two perennial chokers can ever make it back to a championship game. Just an idea.

  3. 11. New England (10-7). I don’t think Pepper Johnson’s going to be a happy man if he doesn’t get the defensive coordinator gig.

  4. “The recent stir about steroid allegations regarding Michael Vick isn’t getting much attention in Philadelphia.”
    Vick’s on his way out of here, so nobody cares. People would rather continue beating the “should the Eagles trade McNabb?” horse to death.

  5. Im a fan of every philly sports team so believe me when I say every single media member in philly are a bunch of whiny babies. I hate every single one of them they are pathetic. Mike Richards is 100% correct when he says use fabricate stories or start controversy. Of course the guy isnt going to remember them on the spot when 10 of your fellow whiners bombard him after a loss when he doesnt no its coming. But still you lied, he did point out a situation when uses fabricated a story. You just did what you always do in this article and acted like it didnt happen to forward your agenda.
    Its funny this guy writes an article about whiners and all he does during the article is whine. He whines about T.O. for leaving philly and whines about Mcnabb Richards and Kobe b/c they hate the philly media which essentially means they hate him. So instead of this guy listing the 10 actual biggest whiners in sports he instead listed people that have hurt his feelings. Get over it you whiner.
    You cant have a list about whining with out Ricky Watters. Yes he played in philly but thats not why I think hes a whiner. When ever a guy says “For Who, For What” when referring to his current team that makes him whiner number 1.

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