Saturday morning one-liners


Bills G.M. Buddy Nix says that QB Vince Young won’t be a distraction, but he already is.

Former Texas A&M WR Jeff Fuller, son of former 49ers DB Jeff Fuller, would like to reunite with QB Ryan Tannehill as a member of the Dolphins.

The mystery finally has been solved:  Tim Tebow won’t be living in Hoboken.

Patriots offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels used the word “exciting” three times when describing the team’s offense.  (And now we know why he liked Tebow so much.)

Former Steelers WR Hines Ward threw out the first pitch for Thursday night’s Pirates game.  (The Pirates probably would have benefited from Hines throwing a few more.)

Former University of Cincinnati QB Tony Pike is trying to win a spot on the Bengals’ 90-man offseason roster.

Browns RB Trent Richardson attributed a couple of rough handoffs at minicamp practice to having “double numbers” on his jersey, which makes the front more slippery.

Tennis star Serena Williams recently recorded a rap song at a studio owned by Ravens LT Bryant McKinnie.  (He charged her only $4.3 million.)

Texans NT Earl Mitchell has bulked up from 287 pounds to 308.

The Titans Caravan rolled into Huntsville, Alabama this week.  (Fortunately, former Titans DT Albert Haynesworth wasn’t driving.)

Colts owner Jim Irsay’s late-night tweet of the week:  “Got mashed potatoes…can’t get no T-bone.”

Is former Jags owner Wayne Weaver trying to one up current owner Shad Khan in the philanthropy department?

Chargers QB Philip Rivers will attend Saturday’s graduation ceremonies at N.C. State.

Chiefs DT Dontari Poe vows to work hard; “Whether I’m the first pick or the last pick, I’m going to go in there and give it my all.”

Two years after being drafted, DT Ben Garland has joined the Broncos’ rookie minicamp, following his release from the Air Force.

Raiders QB Rhett Bomar hopes to make the most of his opportunities at the team’s rookie minicamp.

At last night’s Emmitt Smith charity dinner, former Cowboys CB Keny Gant claimed that he shut down WR Michael Irvin in practice.  (It prompted Irvin to jump out of his chair in the audience, and possibly to exclaim, “Where’s my scissors?“)

Only 15 Redskins remain on the roster from the pre-Shanahan era.

Eagles WR Marvin McNutt isn’t dwelling on his slide to round six.

Giants second-round WR Rueben Randle burned third-round CB Jayron Hosley on Friday.

Bears rookie WR Alshon Jeffrey left practice on Friday with leg cramps.

Some already are expecting Packers LB Nick Perry to be the “savior” of the team’s defense.

Despite the attention being generated by undrafted rookie QB Kellen Moore, Lions coach Jim Schwartz says there’s no guarantee the team will keep a third quarterback on the roster.

Vikings QB Christian Ponder took batting practice with the Twins, Vikings C Jonathan Sullivan bet Ponder he couldn’t hit the ball out of the infield, and Sullivan won.

Panthers first-round LB Luke Kuechley will move from the inside to the outside in Carolina.

Saints rookie CB Corey White apparently has thrown down a challenge to QB Drew Brees.

Bucs DE Da’Quan Bowers had successful surgery on his ruptured Achilles tendon, extending to 143,254 the streak of consecutive procedures performed on pro athletes without a concession that the player got butchered.

Falcons DE Ray Edwards spent $12,000 to take a fan to Las Vegas.  (Nope, there’s no need for better efforts to encourage players to be more careful with their money.)

The tempo at Oregon practices made it easier for RB LaMichael James to adjust to his first NFL practice.

Cardinals coach defines success at the team’s rookie minicamp based on whether they line up in the right spot.

Seahawks QB Russell Wilson received all the reps during the team portion of Friday’s practice, relegating the two other quarterbacks (Chris Hart and Josh McGregor) to standing around and watching.

Ram undrafted OL Michael Hays came within a millimeter of losing his life five years ago, after being stabbed in the chest.