Saturday morning one-liners

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The Dolphins gritted their teeth and celebrated the success of the local NBA franchise that makes the local NFL franchise even less relevant locally.  And nationally.

There will be more cops at Bills games this year.  (Fans would prefer more points.)

The University of Florida connection isn’t working out for the Patriots.

Get to know Jets S Josh Bush.

Browns S T.J. Ward likes Ray Horton’s aggressive style; “It’s an attack style, all downhill. We’re really getting after the guys. That’s what I’m most excited about,” Ward said, proving that the point can be conveyed without using terms like “kill” or “hurt” or “inflict mild bruising.”

The Ravens last 2013 draft pick, CB Marc Anthony, hopes to win a job with “physicality and versatility.”

Former Steelers K Jeff Reed did a little bragging recently about his ownership of two Super Bowl rings.

Bengals single-game tickets go on sale June 29; pre-registration was required for visits from the Steelers and the Packers.

Texans WR Andre Johnson and S Ed Reed made it to the teens on NFL Network’s Top 100 countdown.

Colts DL Ricky Jean Francois still gets advice from Donald Heaven, who played OT at Florida State when Jean Francois arrived in 2002.

Titans G Chance Warmack is trying to stay positive as he makes the transition from college to the NFL.

The enhancements to the Jaguars stadium will start after the 2013 season and are expected to be ready by the start of the 2014 season.

Chargers FB Le’Ron McClain is holding a free football camp for kids in Alabama on Saturday.

Ditto for Chiefs RB Jamaal Charles, who started his fourth annual free camp for 175 kids on Friday in Texas.

Whatever Broncos WR Wes Welker got paid this week to talk repeatedly about his hair plugs, it wasn’t nearly enough.

When news broke that actor James Gandolfini has passed, some fans thought Raiders assistant Tony Sparano had died.

Cowboys QB Tony Romo didn’t earn a spot on NFLN’s Top 100 list, after coming in at No. 91 in 2012 and No. 72 in 2011.

The Associated Press style book would seem to suggest that any publication adhering to it should not use the term Redskins.

A New Jersey accountant who allegedly scammed the state out of nearly $700,000 in false unemployment claims used the money to buy, among other things, Giants season tickets.

Kyle Shurmur, the son of Eagles offensive coordinator Pat Shurmur, is 6-4 and slated to play quarterback for La Salle High School.

The Packers have reduced from nine night training-camp practices in 2012 to zero in 2013.

Retired Bears LB Brian Urlacher is playing a lot of golf; “The first thing on my mind when I wake up isn’t working out anymore,” Urlacher said.  “So that’s a good thing.”

Vikings CB Xavier Rhodes arrived at Florida State as a receiver, and when he was moved to defense he initially wanted to transfer.

LB Jon Morgan is trying to win a spot on the Lions roster as an undrafted free agent.

Saints WE Marques Colston is hosting a receivers camp on Saturday for kids 10 to 18 years old.

50 sacks may be a bit unrealistic, but Panthers LB Greg Hardy could be in for a big year.

A 150-year-old church in Atlanta wants $24.5 million to move from the footprint of the Change Purse; the city has offered $15.5 million.

The Buccaneers’ “Rookie Club” spent time this week with local kids in Tampa.

So how can players like 49ers WR Michael Crabtree recover so quickly from a torn Achilles tendon?

Cardinals running backs coach Stump Mitchell is helping rookie RB Stepfan Taylor catch up after missing the offseason program due to the ridiculous, outdated, and unfair rule that prevents first-year players from working until the students at the college the players no longer attend have taken their final exams.

Seahawks DE Michael Bennett told the Real Rob Report that he’s never seen a pace like the one at Seahawks practices.

35 first-year Rams stuck around for “Rookie Week,” an up-close introduction to St. Louis.  (Which for most of them will be completely irrelevant by September.)