Saturday morning one-liners

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Former Jets WR Santonio Holmes continues to be unemployed, but his trainer is confident he’ll find a job.

Former Patriots WR Derrick Johnson believes he’ll be re-signed once he’s healthy.

Bills RB Fred Jackson will sign autographs on Monday night in Amherst.

Dolphins LB Dannell Ellerbe has a very good reason to look forward to Father’s Day.

Steelers S Shamarko Thomas is looking for a bigger role by better knowing the defense.

The Bengals are grooming four young coaches via the Bill Walsh NFL Minority Coaching Fellowship.

If, as some think they might, the Ravens cut DL Chris Canty, he’ll leave with a $500,000 roster bonus he received in March.

If you’re looking for a great Father’s Day story, look no farther than Browns rookie CB Pierre Desir.

Should the Texans drop the faςade and just name QB Ryan Fitzpatrick the starter?  (I feel extra fanςy whenever I ςan use that melting “c” thing.  Whatever it is.)

Jaguars TE Marcedes Lewis will hold his sixth annual youth football camp on Saturday in Long Beach, California.

Colts QB Andrew Luck, his father Oliver, and the rest of the family will have a rare get-together on Father’s Day weekend when Andrew’s sister, Mary Ellen, graduates from Stanford.

The Titans already are paying players more frequently that once per week for 17 weeks in the season.

LB LaMarr Woodley is the first Ted Hendricks Award winner to play for the Raiders, with whom Hendricks won three Super Bowls.

Former Broncos WR Ed McCaffrey runs football and cheerleading camps for persons with Down syndrome.

With exams finally over at Oregon, the Chiefs will get a good look at RB De’Anthony Thomas during mandatory minicamp.

Chargers players like LB Donald Butler supported the San Diego Food Bank at the San Diego County Fair.

Add Mike Tyson to the list of people who think the Washington NFL franchise should change its name.

Cowboys WR Cole Beasley could have an expanded role in the team’s passing attack this year.

Eagles WR Arrelious Benn talks about the challenges he has faced during his NFL career.

Giants LB Mark Herzlich has written a book about his battle with cancer.

Packers QB Aaron Rodgers opened up about his relationship with actress Olivia Munn.

Vikings offensive coordinator Norv Turner has quickly gotten the attention of his players; “He creates this intensity and this sense of urgency in practice that I haven’t seen throughout my 10 years,” QB Matt Cassel said.

Bears CB Charles Tillman is relieved his team wasn’t drafted for Hard Knocks.

A Lions fan has had “2015 Super Bowl Champs” tattooed on his leg.  (It’s unknown whether he has also tattooed “D-U-M-B” and “A-S-S-um-S” on his knuckles.)

Panthers WR Tiquan Underwood, who has been hanging around the bottom of rosters for so long that his hairdo has both gone in and out style, wants to show that he’s dependable.

Falcons coach Mike Smith sees QB Matt Ryan as a coach on the field.

Buccaneers S Dashon Goldson is offering his California home for rent.  At a mere $4,600 per month.

A deceased Saints fan opted for a Weekend At Bernie’s-style funeral, with body seated at a table, a cigarette and a drink in hand, and nails painted with the colors of her favorite team.

Will the 49ers make a run at free-agent CB Brandon Flowers?

Seahawks rookie WR Paul Richardson says he, and not Earl Thomas, will be the team’s punt returner.

Even with plenty of changes, the Cardinals expect no dip in the performance of their defense.

Could the NFL draft come to St. Louis?  Sure, as long as the Rams are still there.