1. Seattle Seahawks (No. 1 last week; 2-1): Why couldn’t they have toyed with the Broncos like this in February?
2. Cincinnati Bengals (No. 5; 3-0): It’s a lot easier to be among the NFL’s best when there aren’t playoff games to win.
3. Denver Broncos (No. 2; 2-1): At least they won’t be intimidated if they play Seattle again in February.
4. Philadelphia Eagles (No. 7; 3-0): How long until Cary Williams is doing shirtless situps in his driveway?
5. New England Patriots (No. 3; 2-1): Given the way he secured the game-clinching interception, maybe Vince Wilfork should be moved to tight end.
6. Arizona Cardinals (No. 8; 3-0): Bruce Arians isn’t the coach of the year; he’s the coach of the century.
7. Baltimore Ravens (No. 10; 2-1): Given the way this team plays under duress, maybe the next conspiracy should be to start more conspiracies.
8. San Diego Chargers (No. 12; 2-1): It’ll be hard to keep winning games if they keep losing running backs every week.
9. Atlanta Falcons (No. 14; 2-1): They should have saved some of those points for later in the season.
10. Pittsburgh Steelers (No. 16; 2-1): At a time when the Panthers were becoming the Steelers, the Steelers showed the Panthers who the Steelers really are.
11. New Orleans Saints (No. 11; 1-2): Before Drew Brees was slammed to the ground, it looked like the Vikings were applying a sleeper hold to the Saints.
12. Detroit Lions (No. 17; 2-1): Stephen Tulloch’s injury proves that the Lions haven’t had nearly enough practice celebrating things.
13. Chicago Bears (No. 13; 2-1): Two non-convincing road wins are still a lot better than two non-convincing road losses.
14. Green Bay Packers (No. 4; 1-2): Maybe they just stink.
15. Carolina Panthers (No. 6; 2-1): Maybe they should reinstate Greg Hardy so he can play on the offensive line.
16. Indianapolis Colts (No. 15; 1-2): Yes, the Jaguars are so bad that blowing them out results in a one-spot drop in the rankings.
17. San Francisco 49ers (No. 9; 1-2): That “Who’s got it better than us?” chant could soon become, “Who doesn’t?”
18. Buffalo Bills (No. 18; 2-1): Yep, we know how the “Bills start strong in September” book ends.
19. Dallas Cowboys (No. 23; 2-1): This team is still a long way from glorywhole.
20. Houston Texans (No. 19; 2-1): I have a feeling I won’t be hearing from many of the folks who had complained that the 2-0 Texans were only No. 19.
21. New York Jets (No. 20; 1-2): It’s just a matter of time before Mike Vick is playing enough to get injured again.
22. Cleveland Browns (No. 21; 1-2): The schedule softens considerably on the other side of the bye week.
23. Washington (No. 22; 1-2): When they trade RGIII, they probably won’t get three first-round picks and a second-round pick.
24. Kansas City Chiefs (No. 28; 1-2): With games against the Patriots and 49ers looming, that win at Miami likely helped avoid taking an 0-5 record into the bye week.
25. Miami Dolphins (No. 24; 1-2): Losing two games in a row after beating the Patriots has become a trend.
26. New York Giants (No. 30; 1-2): One win over a team with a fraudulent 2-0 record doesn’t mean everything is fixed.
27. St. Louis Rams (No. 25; 1-2): It takes a bad team to make the Cowboys look that good.
28. Tennessee Titans (No. 26; 1-2): Week One feels like it was a long time ago.
29. Minnesota Vikings (No. 27; 1-2): A season of quiet optimism has yielded to loud pessimism.
30. Oakland Raiders (No. 32; 0-3): Maybe they won’t go 0-16, after all.
31. Jacksonville Jaguars (No. 31; 0-3): With all the focus on the team’s crappy offense, it’s easy to forget they have a crappy defense.
32. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (No. 29; 0-3): Last week’s performance in the team’s new uniforms could make fans forget about all the horrible performances in the team’s original uniforms.