1. Patriots (8-0; last week No. 1): Without Dion Lewis, they might start winning more games by fewer than 10 points.
2. Bengals (8-0; No. 2): A mere 200 games into his tenure with the franchise, Marvin Lewis has his best Bengals team yet.
3. Panthers (8-0; No. 4): The road to Santa Clara is destined to go through Charlotte.
4. Cardinals (6-2; No. 6): The Cardinals will either cement or forfeit their stop in the top five on Sunday night in Seattle.
5. Packers (6-2; No. 5): “Microsoft Surface . . . You may not like what you see, but you’ll see it in crisp, vivid color!”
6. Broncos (7-1; No. 3): Contrary to popular belief in the Denver locker room, they did not win a Lombardi Trophy by beating the Packers by 20 points.
7. Vikings (6-2; No. 7): Beating the Rams allowed them to stay put; to climb, they need to beat the Raiders and the Packers.
8. Steelers (5-4; No. 13): If Landry Jones can find a way to beat the Browns, the Steelers should still be in good shape for the playoff run.
9. Rams (4-4; No. 8): The combination of Todd Gurley and Tavon Austin is as dangerous as any in the league; the problem is the rest of the offense.
10. Seahawks (4-4; No. 10): The road to the Super Bowl won’t be going through Seattle, which probably means Seattle won’t be going back to the Super Bowl.
11. Raiders (4-4; No. 9): No great quarterback can ever truly become a great quarterback if his defense allows 531 yards. To two guys.
12. Jets (5-3; No. 12): Maybe the Jets, not the Bills, should make IK Enemkpali a captain on Thursday night.
13. Falcons (6-3; No. 11): When did Mike Smith start coaching this team again?
14. Eagles (4-4; No. 16): Congratulations, the offense is finally average.
15. Giants (5-4; No. 17): To ensure a win over the Patriots, they should paint Super Bowl logos on the field.
16. Bills (4-4; No. 20): Their new “Color Rush” uniforms prove that the Bills have decided that if they can’t be the Patriots, they’ll at least look like them.
17. Saints (4-5; No. 14): Three years after losing at home to then-rookie Robert Griffin III, the Saints have lost at home to rookies Marcus Mariota and Jameis Winston.
18. Colts (4-5; No. 23): The firing of Pep Hamilton woke this team up enough to prevent the firing of Chuck Pagano.
19. Dolphins (3-5; No. 15): They can cancel the order of the bronze for Dan Campbell’s Hall of Fame bust.
20. Cowboys (2-6; No. 18): They may have to eventually follow seven straight losses with seven straight wins to have a chance at the playoffs.
21. Washington (3-5; No. 19): I hope Kirk Cousins genuinely liked that win over the Bucs, because he may not be getting many more this year.
22. Chiefs (3-5; No. 22): A win at Denver could make things a little interesting in the AFC West.
23. Buccaneers (3-5; No. 21): If you listen closely, you can hear Mike Evans dropping another pass.
24. Ravens (2-6; No. 24): John Harbaugh eventually may have to pull a reverse Belichick, with Baltimore’s defensive backs playing receiver.
25. Texans (3-5; No. 25): The goal of getting blown out at New England in the playoffs is still very much alive.
26. Bears (3-5; No. 27): John Fox’s first year in Chicago was a very good year for the Bears to play the teams of the AFC West.
27. 49ers (3-6; No. 31): Good news, Blaine Gabbert! You played well enough against the Falcons to earn a start against the Seahawks. Bad news, Blaine Gabbert! You played well enough against the Falcons to earn a start against the Seahawks.
28. Jaguars (2-6; No. 26): They’re making progress, but will they make enough before Shad Khan runs out of patience?
29. Browns (2-7; No. 28): Johnny Manziel has improved significantly in a year; he lost to Cincinnati by 21 instead of by 30.
30. Titans (2-6; No. 30): If the goal is to lay the foundation for hiring Chip Kelly, they may not want to win too many more games.
31. Chargers (2-6; No. 29): There’s a new ballot measure in L.A. on the question of whether the Chargers should be banned from moving there.
32. Lions (1-7; No. 32): Ford’s next kick-ass muscle car should be named the Martha.